


Nick's a dick. (Ellis' Perspective.)

by PhoebeshipsNellis



Category: Left 4 Dead 2, Nellis - Fandom, Nick x Ellis - Fandom
Genre: But then also Patrichelle, Kind of Cochelle, M/M, Nellis, left 4 dead 2 - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-11
Updated: 2015-04-21
Packaged: 2018-01-11 23:03:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 21
Words: 38,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1179003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhoebeshipsNellis/pseuds/PhoebeshipsNellis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Basically a story all about cutesy naive Ellis and his bad ideas and super hunky mean guy Nick coming to the rescue but not coming to the rescue also because Nick's a dick.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Rookie

Man, why did Nick have to be so mean? What was his problem? He always yelled at me and swore. He never said anything nice to me, like he was to Coach and Rochelle and I hadn’t done anything wrong.

“Hey Asshat, get over here and help!”

A man in a bloody, used-to-be-white professional suit gave me a nasty glare with spiteful eyes as I slipped a heavy defibrillator unit onto the hook of my denim waist-tied jumpsuit. I touched my trucker hat, self-consciously and fixed it to face the front. I did eventually get over to him but by the time I reached the foul-mouthed con artist he gave me another nasty look, pushed his hand, one finger occupied by a gold, slightly bronzing ring, through his slicked back, dark hair and told me the job was already done. I sighed, drooping my hands into my jumpsuit pockets, Nick followed Coach into an old styled café and I hung back behind them.. Chairs were tipped over and tables were scattered so I picked up a chair and dragged it against the wall and sat beside an old, brightly lit jukebox that surprisingly work. I was tempted to turn it on and see what cd was in there so I scanned the area. _Oh that’s disgusting_ , I thought, spotting a zombie vomiting up a bloody, dark gunky substance and gagged myself. I felt a hand on my shoulder and I immediately flicked it off and swung my shotgun off my shoulder into a ready position, Rochelle stood with her arms folded in front of me and her eyebrows furrowed.

“So you’re going to shoot me but not that zombie?” She said, boy she had attitude. She also had blood all over her pink, band shirt that got onto her arm, I felt conflicted to tell her but she was mad enough.

“Reflexes,” I said with a shrug. I swung my shotgun back over my shoulder, colliding with the baseball making a loud thud. Why was everyone so mad at me today? I hope Coach wasn’t as well. Rochelle stared me down a little longer and shook her head slowly with her eyes shut. She began to walk to the back of the café leaving me by myself and I panicked, I didn’t like being left alone, usually we’d each pair up but they were mad at me. I rushed after Rochelle pushing through a door to the storage but she had already caught up with the other two and they walked slowly in front of me so I walked even slower and watched my heavy boots clunk one after the other. I could hear them talking in low voices in front of me.

I looked up and witnessed them walk right past a door, too busy in their conversation.

“Hey guys, let’s check it out!” I told them, holding onto the door knob, partially listening closely to the door for safety measures and partially looking at them all keep walking. They weren’t too far ahead of me, so I waited longer for a reply.

“Leave it, Rookie,” Coach said, yelling slightly, not even turning back.

 _Humph Rookie? I’ll show ‘em._ I thought to myself, forcefully pushing open the door with a bang. It was a dark room so I adjusted my torch onto my waist clip and pulled my baseball bat to my side. I flicked on the torch and began searching in the lightest part of the room. I pulled through boxes and pushed shelves out of the way, I made my way to the right gradually and found a Molotov.

“Boo yah! Molotov!” I congratulated myself and slipped it into my pocket. I crouched down on the furthest part of the room, leaning over and grabbing a first aid, feeling a battle whether to take the first aid kit or the defib unit. I tried to make a quick decision before I heard my name called in an obvious voice.

“Ellis, you dumb hick!” I stood up thumping my head on the top shelf and the door slammed shut. I gathered the first aid kit and began unclipping the defib unit as I heard footsteps get closer and closer, I dropped the defibrillator with a loud thud and picked it up to put it in the shelf neatly, just in case.

“Ellis?”

“Yeah?” I yelled back at the voice, hearing a door open next door.

I leaned the defibrillator against the wall and picked up the first aid kit. A small grumble came from the corner of the room, right beside where I was standing. I stood as still as possible and turned off my torch quickly, it was pitch black but if I made no noise I could edge my way out without being attacked.

Regret punched me in my gut, hard. I touched the shelves so I could guide myself; the only light was coming from the crack under the door. Another low growl came from the corner and I panicked, I hated being left alone. I was waiting for someone to open the door so I could run for it but the voice was gone. I felt scared, alone in this dark room with some creature. I clutched the shelf quietly and my heart bet rapidly, my breath was unsteady but I couldn’t adjust it until I was out of reach of the creature. I heard movement in the corner and another louder growl. I pulled my shotgun off my back and aimed at the dark, not focused on anything. I wasn’t supposed to use my gun on zombies, just my baseball bat but one shot of a shotgun couldn’t kill any special infected except a Spitter. The growls gave me a clear guess that a hunter was awaking in the corner, just I couldn’t see it and couldn’t risk turning on my light. I had a better chance of escaping then killing the hunter in time before it pounced on me.

I stepped back a little bit and accidentally kicked a box I had moved before, the hunter gave a scream and instinctively I switched on my torch and fired at the crouching creature. I hit it but didn’t kill it, it screamed again and I stumbled backwards, tripping over and hit the ground hard. I aimed at the hunter as it pounced onto a shelf; I shot it and started shaking, my hands sweating desperately.

To my rescue, I heard loud footsteps and yelling approaching my position. The hunter screamed again and landed in front of me, I shot a few more times, missing a couple of times and kicked a box into it. It staggered onto its feet and crouched again, I was reloading and it came closer, rapidly. I yelped as I saw it ready to pounce and shut my eyes, facing it, I had deserved this, probably.

A loud bang followed by another few loud bangs happened in just a few seconds. I felt a lifeless hunter drop onto me and I pushed it off, I was in shock, I shut my eyes tight and pulled my knees close to me. My breathing was incredibly unsteady and felt as if I was going to pass out any second.

“No, Ellis, c’mon we’re here, you’re safe,” A low, strong voice said, grasping my hand and trying to pull me to my feet, it was Coach. I stood up carefully, opening my eyes. I saw them all staring, Coach worried, Rochelle scared and Nick disappointed and just following that I saw the ceiling. I had passed out.

 

~


	2. Aw Ellis.

“This is my entire fault; I shouldn’t have just left him.”

“The little fucker shouldn’t have gone off on his own anyway.”

“Nick! Shut up! Rochelle, you didn’t do anything wrong, girl.”

I awoke but kept my eyes shut, pretending I was still out. I was lying on uncomfortable concrete, guessing we were in one of the parking ticket booths. I heard a shuffle and a loud screech.

“Rochelle, you’re coming with me, Nick, look after Ellis or I’ll make sure you pass out as well.” Coach said, intimidatingly. Nick growled, quietly. The loud screech followed once Coach and Rochelle left, they had blocked the door with a large dumpster. I could hear Nick fuming and swearing under his breath, sitting quite a while away. In my head I began to recap what happened and it scared me even then, just thinking about it. I squirmed and immediately sobbed, though I still had my eyes shut I tried my best to stop sobbing and go back to being passed out. I heard Nick stop his fuming and felt him look down at me. I was making a muffled crying noise though there were no tears.

“E-Ellis?” Nick said, stuttering, nervously. Why was he nervous? He wasn’t the one in terror trying to stop sobbing and clear my mind of that moment, my head was also pounding. I felt my head with slight movement and stiffened, frightened of where my hat was. I didn’t want Nick to think I was awake yet so I pretended to turn and felt for my hat, it was right next to me, thankfully and I stopped sobbing. I retreated my arms and tried to sleep, I was exhausted. I heard Nick get up and shuffle over to me. I heard the cap picked off the floor, Nick had picked it up, I took a peek and Nick was playing with my hat, I felt angry, I had always insulted me and my hat so why was he smiling at it with such a smirk. He looked up to something, well he always did, but the way he was looking at my hat was extremely suspicious. I shut my eyes tight again. I felt as if I was going to start sobbing again, so I curled into a ball on the concrete and my hip dug into the ground hard, I flinched slightly, moving to the left a bit. I heard Nick moving again and he sat down beside me, he touched my hair, running his hand through my dirty, light brown hair. I felt comforted for the first time in such a long time, ever since Keith and I fell asleep in one of the mattress shops. I turned over and put my head on Nick’s lap, it was darn best pillow I could get and he petted me longer, though I didn’t like being the puppy of the group I certainly felt like it and enjoyed it this once.

“Cute,” I heard him snigger, “So darn cute Ellis.” My stomach turned, usually he would have said something sarcastic and mean but this one time he said something nice. I snuggled in closer and he put his arms around me. He must have been pretty tired because he fell asleep before me and stayed holding onto me, I fell asleep a while after him.

_It was just me and the hunter again, it was growling in the corner again, I turned my torch on and shone it on the hunter. It crawled forward un-naturally fast and my heart was thumping hard, I yelled as it pounced onto me, knocking me onto my back. It was screaming and spitting in my face, drips of blood dribbling out of its mouth. It was clawing into my chest, it really hurt and each time it clawed it left a big red mark with scars, blood pouring out of me. I saw Nick walk in, with his shabby suit covered in more blood than ever and started yelling for him, he was aiming but he missed the hunter and shot my arm, I screamed just push it at him but Nick looked upset and kept shooting. I was lying in a pool of my own blood and I kept screaming Nick’s name, looking directly at him, he gave up and put his rifle to his side and watched. I was crying for his help but he didn’t react, hot tears streamed down my faces and I struggled with all my might to wrestle the hunter off me. “Ellis!” Nick yelled at me, “Get up!” I cried harder, “I can’t!” I was screaming back. The hunter shook me hard._

“Get up, oh please!” Nick yelled at me and I awoke in a daze, clinging onto him. He was holding me tightly to his chest and kept patting my head. His blue shirt was soaked through and it wasn’t until I saw that did I realize I was crying my eyes out. “Ellis, come on, please, I need you,” And his voice broke as he said it.

“N-Nick?” I said blushing, quietly as tears still streamed down my face.

“Oh Ellis!” He exclaimed, looking at my face with one hand under my chin and the other wiping my tears. I grabbed his shirt and cried into it.

“Oh Nick, I was havin’ tha worst night-a-mare.” I sobbed, muffled. I hated crying but it had been the first time since I got separated from Keith. Nick held me close and comforted me.

“You’re alright now, kid.” He said softly. I reminded myself of when Nick wouldn’t save me in the dream and I punched him, hard in the stomach before stumbling onto my feet.

“What was that for?!” He yelled, regaining his grump again. He also was getting onto his feet.

“Fur’ not helpin’ me and shootin’ me in my dream instead, I can’t believe it, Nick, it really scare’me, I ain’t know what was real or a dream and you was lookin’ so darn real and you was shootin’ me, not the hunta and you was covered in blood and Ro and Coach weren’t there and it was scary!” At the start I was yelling, raging and now I was crying again. Nick didn’t comfort me this time; he just stared and leaned against a wall, sliding down it with his head in his palms. I picked up my hat and held it close to my chest, firmly, sniffling fiercely.

“I know ya wouldn’t-a do that.”

He didn’t say anything he just kept his head in his hands.

“Right, Nick?”

I leaned closer to him.

“Nick, please tell me ya wouldn’t-a do that!” I said, desperately.

“I’m not a monster, Ellis.” He replied, quietly.

I sighed, looking down at him. I adjusted my cap onto my head. He took his head out of his palms and for once he was looking up to me, literally but still, he _was_ looking up to me. He looked little and innocent; almost as naïve as he accused me to be, stress flooded his face and he kept squeezing his eyes shut, holding his head and then opening his eyes. He looked a wreck so I decided it was my turn to comfort him. I pushed myself against the wall and slid down it so I was sitting beside Nick.

“Ah remember this time Keith weres gettin’ stressed and worked up so he bought ‘imself a prostatute, ‘course he don’t know what the purpose was so he gave her money to hang around for a few hours and all they did was talk and she had the best night of her life, ain’t that just the darnest?” I told Nick, he didn’t even interrupt my story. I began to feel sick in the stomach and I was getting impatient with Rochelle and Coach.

“Ah mean, Ah could be your prositatute, Nick?” I said, suddenly I felt flustered as he looked sideways at me, his expression on his face hard to read, with his thin lips and dead eyes, no wonder he was a well-good con artist. “No that came out wrong, what ah meant ter say is you don’t have ter pay me.” I paused and put my head in my hands, “Ah am an idiot.”

Nick began sniggering.

“Go on, laff,” I said, defeated. I looked at him and he was holding back laughter, his lips turned inward and his cheeks going crimson. He busted out laughing, booming loudly into my ear, it was nice to see him happy for once though instead of grumpy. He put his arm around me and pulled me close.

“You’re the biggest idiot in the world.” He said before loosening his grip and looking out the distance. I was warming up to Nick finally; behind his expressional poker face he had the sweetest smile and a god mighty laugh. His arm was still around shoulder so I gently took his hand and pulled his arm tighter and leaned into Nick. He snapped back into reality and looked as if he was going to protest but I stared at him, he looked back at me guiltily before pretending to not care. He leaned his head onto my cap and we waited for Rochelle and  Coach to return, it had been about 3 hours but it usually took about 6, though I didn’t mind waiting here with this sweet Nick, I snuggled into the crest of his neck and shut my eyes.

“Darn, you’re deceiving, overalls,” He smirked.


	3. Dumb Hick.

Nick fell asleep again, he was exhausted but he had every right to be, he was the one that fiercely insisted everyone get sleep and he’d keep watch, he was the one who was running all over the place and picking us up, growling as he’d do it, he was the one who’d take charge and give orders and he’d do everything with such a stubborn and aggressive attitude. Though without Nick, I would be dead, probably.

I stared at his tired face, his eyes were shut and his soft lashes reflected the light, shining dully through the boarded up window. His lips were thin and always in a frown, he never looked happy and when did, well boy, I got butterflies. His bright white teeth bleared aggressively even when he was smiling, no wonder he’d con even men, gosh he could con me and I would fall to my knees immediately, not in the sexual way, well hell if he were that good at conning I maybe would. His slicked back, dark hair was enough for Rochelle to have looked at him like that before but every little feature of him was wonderful.

I smiled at him, softly. Even after everything he’d said I would forgive him in a heartbeat, too bad he never says sorry.  I looked away and tried to distract myself.  _No way I’m not gay_ I thought, shaking my head, though even then I felt a little doubtful _, Not that Nick would even allow me to be gay with him._

It was quiet and silence lingered, painfully, the only noise I could hear was Nick’s slow breathing. He was still leaning on me, I moved my head and his head gently dropped to my shoulder and he made a tired grunt noise before shifting my way more. “This one time,” I began, whispering to myself for comfort, “Keith and I, we was stuck in a phone booth and nobody was ‘round and it was one of them see through ones and he say to me that if it came down to it he was sorry if he had to ate me so I said that’s okay, I mean I didn’t want ma buddy to starve.” I smiled at my own story, remembering Keith; gosh he was a heck of fun.  I looked over at Nick; even in his sleep he looked cunning.

 I heard something banging on the dumpster and I leaned over for my baseball that was placed on a table, I stretched, careful of the drowsy man leaning on me to catch his forty winks. I grabbed the base and pulled it off the table quietly, holding it in one hand firmly and one hand loosely.  _I am brave, I’m not a rookie!_  I thought, determined, watching the dumpster carefully and also being watchful of Nick. To my surprise, as ready as I was, my guard dropped fast when I heard a soft giggle and low voices, outside.

“What? Zombie don’t-” A loud screech cut my sentence off and Coach and Rochelle appeared from the side of the dumpster, I looked at Nick and felt conflicted to push him off, stop his tough guy reputation from being ruined but it was too late. Rochelle gave a soft, heart-warmed sigh and Coach chuckled at the sight, I put my finger on my lips and Nick snored, quietly, on.  Rochelle and Coach both looked rather flustered, Rochelle giggling and blushing and Coach was fixing his sport shirt collar. It struck me finally what took them so long and I looked away awkwardly. Rochelle saw my face, felt embarrassed and tried to change the atmosphere.

“It’s good to see you’re feeling better,” Rochelle said, quietly, giving a halfhearted smile.

 Coach nodded, but pointed at Nick, “Sleepyhead’s going to have to get up, we’ve got to go and fast.” He was much louder than Rochelle.

“Why?” I asked, hoping to let Nick get extra zees, I liked Nick snuggling up to me really.

Coach looked at Rochelle with both eyebrows raised and there was a long pause before Coach said, “Uh, a Jockey must’ve heard us wandering and searching around, bumping into things and uhhh… well, now he’s onto us.”

I sighed and looked over at Nick, gosh, I don’t want the grumpy Nick back but I had to wake him. I took hold of his shoulder and shook it a little, he didn’t wake up so I looked up at Coach, he was getting impatient and folded his arms over his bloated stomach, if it wasn’t for his bright purple shirt I could have mistook him for a boomer.  I focused my attention back onto Nick and shook his shoulder harder.

“Nick, yer gotta get up now,” I said, a little disappointment was traced in my voice. A loud groan came from Nick’s mouth followed by a growly voice telling me to fuck off and took his head off my shoulder, pushing me away gently with a weak, sleepy hand. I sighed; he woke up, squinting his eyes, full of hatred. I frowned and he did too, but my frown was an upset frown and his was an anger frown. He stumbled onto his knees, stretching over for his gun and got onto his feet, as he were drunk. I got up as well and grabbed my items, a Molotov, a shotgun and a first aid kit. I noticed Coach, Rochelle and Nick didn’t have first aid anymore, they had used them all on me, gosh I must’ve been a mess. I had my baseball already adjusted and attached the other items as well. Coach frowned at Nick as he spat and swore about his stuff and leaving him alone with ‘that annoying hillbilly’, a knot formed in my stomach and I didn’t look at him, I looked down at my boots and waited for everyone to be ready and move out of this place. I heard them squeeze past the dumpster and I walked out slowly, behind everyone.

Rochelle, right in front of me, turned around and saw my face, and she dropped back to walk beside me. I held my baseball bat, loosely in one hand and dragged it behind me, scraping along the concrete ground. She gave me a sad frown and put her arm around my shoulders.

“What’s the matter, sweetie?” She asked softly, looking at me. I looked straight forward, in front of me were Coach and Nick, Coach yelled at him and Nick kept swearing and growling back. I shrugged Rochelle’s arm off my shoulders and shook my head, she exhaled angrily.

“No, I will stop you right now and ask you again if you don’t tell me and we just want to hurry up and get to the safe house, don’t we?” She said, aggressively, I hated when she spoke with such resentment.

“Ah, its nuddin’, just feelin’ a little blue from the incident before,” I lied; I was looking straight forward and Rochelle exhaled again but rolled her eyes and kept silent.

A few blood and guts blown apart later, we reached a door leading to the next passage. Coach twisted the door knob slowly, opened the door a little bit and slipped his shotgun in first and flicked the torch light on. He looked back at us, opened the door fully and signaled for us to follow. We all filed in, Coach, Nick, Rochelle then me. We shut the door behind us and began scavenging around for items. I pulled open a health shelf and inside was three bottles of pain pills; I yelled to the others my discovery and let them take them as I had my own first aid. Rochelle walked over to come collect a bottle, she smiled at me and I shone, proud. Coach quickly took his and placed it in his pocket, before giving me a pat on the back and going back to search in a cupboard. Nick, looked over to me, scowling and shuffled over, he sighed and snatched the container, he stared at me as he were to say anything supportive but he grunted and looked away. Rochelle and Coach were both busy searching and Nick sat on a work bench with his legs swinging off it, so I went over to Nick and leaned on the work bench beside him. He shuffled over a bit and I sighed, ready to give up but my spirits rose when he patted the bench, he invited me to sit up there with him so I did, I heaved myself up and sat, quietly, beside him. Nick was staring at me but I was looking at Rochelle instead.

“I can’t help being a jerk, you know?” Nick said to me, quiet enough for me to hear only. I looked him and groaned, quietly.

“What is yer problem, Nick? I thought you was sweet and cool and stuff but no yer so insensitive and yer always makin’ excuses fer yer actions insteada just apologizin’!” I said, going from barely hearable to talking, loudly at him, anger boiling inside me. Rochelle turned around, shocked, dropping an empty glass bottle, which shattered upon meeting the ground. Coach stuck his head out from the closet. Rochelle hurried to Coach and shooed him inside the closet and hid inside it with him, pretending to give us our privacy when I knew they were listening. Nick just looked shocked before furrowing his eyebrows and frowning spitefully.

“No, Ellis, I have nothing to apologize for! Sorry that you’re just an overly-sensitive dumb hick with nothing better to do than harass me of false accusations!” He yelled back at me, he was breathing heavily and I blinked at him, I didn’t cry and I didn’t yell back but I got up and stood by the door.

“I’M NOT A DUMB HICK!” I shouted, kicking the door open and sprinting out into a horde of zombies. I pushed through them as they all grabbed desperately at me. I ran into a car accidentally and flipped onto it, they were all chasing me and I tried pulling my baseball bat out at my defense, holding it in my shaking hands, crawling backwards up the ruined car. I swung and knocked a few heads off their bodies.

“Ellis!” Rochelle yelled for me, pulling out her AK 47. I saw her and kept swinging.

“I’m not dumb, Ro, I can handle this myself!” I shouted, furiously back at her. Zombies were grasping at my legs, ferociously and yanking me apart, timely I’d hit them with my bat.

“Oh shit, watch out!” I heard Coach yell from afar, Rochelle and Coach were approaching to my rescue as Nick shut the door behind him and leaned against it, viciously. I looked over at Nick and he was staring at me, expressionless. I felt like this was a dream again, when Nick just stood and watched me being torn apart, instead. I gasped as a zombie approached me as I was oblivious to anything but Nick, it hooked my middle and tried tearing off my flesh, I felt winded but glad it wasn’t a smoker. I began trying to recapture my breath as I swung my baseball at nothing.  _Oh god, I hate myself,_  I thought dreadfully.

Nick fell asleep again, he was exhausted but he had every right to be, he was the one that fiercely insisted everyone get sleep and he’d keep watch, he was the one who was running all over the place and picking us up, growling as he’d do it, he was the one who’d take charge and give orders and he’d do everything with such a stubborn and aggressive attitude. Though without Nick, I would be dead, probably.

I stared at his tired face, his eyes were shut and his soft lashes reflected the light, shining dully through the boarded up window. His lips were thin and always in a frown, he never looked happy and when did, well boy, I got butterflies. His bright white teeth bleared aggressively even when he was smiling, no wonder he’d con even men, gosh he could con me and I would fall to my knees immediately, not in the sexual way, well hell if he were that good at conning I maybe would. His slicked back, dark hair was enough for Rochelle to have looked at him like that before but every little feature of him was wonderful.

I smiled at him, softly. Even after everything he’d said I would forgive him in a heartbeat, too bad he never says sorry.  I looked away and tried to distract myself.  _No way I’m not gay_ I thought, shaking my head, though even then I felt a little doubtful _, Not that Nick would even allow me to be gay with him._

It was quiet and silence lingered, painfully, the only noise I could hear was Nick’s slow breathing. He was still leaning on me, I moved my head and his head gently dropped to my shoulder and he made a tired grunt noise before shifting my way more. “This one time,” I began, whispering to myself for comfort, “Keith and I, we was stuck in a phone booth and nobody was ‘round and it was one of them see through ones and he say to me that if it came down to it he was sorry if he had to ate me so I said that’s okay, I mean I didn’t want ma buddy to starve.” I smiled at my own story, remembering Keith; gosh he was a heck of fun.  I looked over at Nick; even in his sleep he looked cunning.

 I heard something banging on the dumpster and I leaned over for my baseball that was placed on a table, I stretched, careful of the drowsy man leaning on me to catch his forty winks. I grabbed the base and pulled it off the table quietly, holding it in one hand firmly and one hand loosely.  _I am brave, I’m not a rookie!_  I thought, determined, watching the dumpster carefully and also being watchful of Nick. To my surprise, as ready as I was, my guard dropped fast when I heard a soft giggle and low voices, outside.

“What? Zombie don’t-” A loud screech cut my sentence off and Coach and Rochelle appeared from the side of the dumpster, I looked at Nick and felt conflicted to push him off, stop his tough guy reputation from being ruined but it was too late. Rochelle gave a soft, heart-warmed sigh and Coach chuckled at the sight, I put my finger on my lips and Nick snored, quietly, on.  Rochelle and Coach both looked rather flustered, Rochelle giggling and blushing and Coach was fixing his sport shirt collar. It struck me finally what took them so long and I looked away awkwardly. Rochelle saw my face, felt embarrassed and tried to change the atmosphere.

“It’s good to see you’re feeling better,” Rochelle said, quietly, giving a halfhearted smile.

 Coach nodded, but pointed at Nick, “Sleepyhead’s going to have to get up, we’ve got to go and fast.” He was much louder than Rochelle.

“Why?” I asked, hoping to let Nick get extra zees, I liked Nick snuggling up to me really.

Coach looked at Rochelle with both eyebrows raised and there was a long pause before Coach said, “Uh, a Jockey must’ve heard us wandering and searching around, bumping into things and uhhh… well, now he’s onto us.”

I sighed and looked over at Nick, gosh, I don’t want the grumpy Nick back but I had to wake him. I took hold of his shoulder and shook it a little, he didn’t wake up so I looked up at Coach, he was getting impatient and folded his arms over his bloated stomach, if it wasn’t for his bright purple shirt I could have mistook him for a boomer.  I focused my attention back onto Nick and shook his shoulder harder.

“Nick, yer gotta get up now,” I said, a little disappointment was traced in my voice. A loud groan came from Nick’s mouth followed by a growly voice telling me to fuck off and took his head off my shoulder, pushing me away gently with a weak, sleepy hand. I sighed; he woke up, squinting his eyes, full of hatred. I frowned and he did too, but my frown was an upset frown and his was an anger frown. He stumbled onto his knees, stretching over for his gun and got onto his feet, as he were drunk. I got up as well and grabbed my items, a Molotov, a shotgun and a first aid kit. I noticed Coach, Rochelle and Nick didn’t have first aid anymore, they had used them all on me, gosh I must’ve been a mess. I had my baseball already adjusted and attached the other items as well. Coach frowned at Nick as he spat and swore about his stuff and leaving him alone with ‘that annoying hillbilly’, a knot formed in my stomach and I didn’t look at him, I looked down at my boots and waited for everyone to be ready and move out of this place. I heard them squeeze past the dumpster and I walked out slowly, behind everyone.

Rochelle, right in front of me, turned around and saw my face, and she dropped back to walk beside me. I held my baseball bat, loosely in one hand and dragged it behind me, scraping along the concrete ground. She gave me a sad frown and put her arm around my shoulders.

“What’s the matter, sweetie?” She asked softly, looking at me. I looked straight forward, in front of me were Coach and Nick, Coach yelled at him and Nick kept swearing and growling back. I shrugged Rochelle’s arm off my shoulders and shook my head, she exhaled angrily.

“No, I will stop you right now and ask you again if you don’t tell me and we just want to hurry up and get to the safe house, don’t we?” She said, aggressively, I hated when she spoke with such resentment.

“Ah, its nuddin’, just feelin’ a little blue from the incident before,” I lied; I was looking straight forward and Rochelle exhaled again but rolled her eyes and kept silent.

A few blood and guts blown apart later, we reached a door leading to the next passage. Coach twisted the door knob slowly, opened the door a little bit and slipped his shotgun in first and flicked the torch light on. He looked back at us, opened the door fully and signaled for us to follow. We all filed in, Coach, Nick, Rochelle then me. We shut the door behind us and began scavenging around for items. I pulled open a health shelf and inside was three bottles of pain pills; I yelled to the others my discovery and let them take them as I had my own first aid. Rochelle walked over to come collect a bottle, she smiled at me and I shone, proud. Coach quickly took his and placed it in his pocket, before giving me a pat on the back and going back to search in a cupboard. Nick, looked over to me, scowling and shuffled over, he sighed and snatched the container, he stared at me as he were to say anything supportive but he grunted and looked away. Rochelle and Coach were both busy searching and Nick sat on a work bench with his legs swinging off it, so I went over to Nick and leaned on the work bench beside him. He shuffled over a bit and I sighed, ready to give up but my spirits rose when he patted the bench, he invited me to sit up there with him so I did, I heaved myself up and sat, quietly, beside him. Nick was staring at me but I was looking at Rochelle instead.

“I can’t help being a jerk, you know?” Nick said to me, quiet enough for me to hear only. I looked him and groaned, quietly.

“What is yer problem, Nick? I thought you was sweet and cool and stuff but no yer so insensitive and yer always makin’ excuses fer yer actions insteada just apologizin’!” I said, going from barely hearable to talking, loudly at him, anger boiling inside me. Rochelle turned around, shocked, dropping an empty glass bottle, which shattered upon meeting the ground. Coach stuck his head out from the closet. Rochelle hurried to Coach and shooed him inside the closet and hid inside it with him, pretending to give us our privacy when I knew they were listening. Nick just looked shocked before furrowing his eyebrows and frowning spitefully.

“No, Ellis, I have nothing to apologize for! Sorry that you’re just an overly-sensitive dumb hick with nothing better to do than harass me of false accusations!” He yelled back at me, he was breathing heavily and I blinked at him, I didn’t cry and I didn’t yell back but I got up and stood by the door.

“I’M NOT A DUMB HICK!” I shouted, kicking the door open and sprinting out into a horde of zombies. I pushed through them as they all grabbed desperately at me. I ran into a car accidentally and flipped onto it, they were all chasing me and I tried pulling my baseball bat out at my defense, holding it in my shaking hands, crawling backwards up the ruined car. I swung and knocked a few heads off their bodies.

“Ellis!” Rochelle yelled for me, pulling out her AK 47. I saw her and kept swinging.

“I’m not dumb, Ro, I can handle this myself!” I shouted, furiously back at her. Zombies were grasping at my legs, ferociously and yanking me apart, timely I’d hit them with my bat.

“Oh shit, watch out!” I heard Coach yell from afar, Rochelle and Coach were approaching to my rescue as Nick shut the door behind him and leaned against it, viciously. I looked over at Nick and he was staring at me, expressionless. I felt like this was a dream again, when Nick just stood and watched me being torn apart, instead. I gasped as a zombie approached me as I was oblivious to anything but Nick, it hooked my middle and tried tearing off my flesh, I felt winded but glad it wasn’t a smoker. I began trying to recapture my breath as I swung my baseball at nothing.  _Oh god, I hate myself,_  I thought dreadfully.


	4. Mutual.

A bang painted red, chunky slobber all over me, and the body of the eaten, discomposing zombie fell off the broken taxi, torn from life for the second time. I tried wiping down my yellow bull shifters t-shirt and it only spread into a thin layer across my chest and stomach, my shirt was turning a disgusting brown color and I began shaking all over. Rochelle’s small hand grasped mine and yanked me off the car roof; I fell off into a useless heap and shakily, got back onto my feet. She was getting incredibly annoyed with me and barely looked at me without spite in her dark brown eyes, Coach just roughly grabbed Nick’s arm and heaved him across the isolated road.

“Safe house,” Coach declared, sternly. Nick was struggling for freedom, trying to loosen Coach’s grip before he was thrown inside the safe house, he fell forward catching himself with his arms and began breathing heavily.

I trailed inside with Rochelle, she walked behind me with her AK 47 still out as if she would shoot me at any sudden movement. Rochelle made sure we were all in before she slammed the door shut, furiously. I leaned against a wall with my arm covering my face, I felt like such an idiot, the wall was nice and cool against me.

“What the hell, Coach?” Nick yelled, picking up new ammo for his rifle. Coach stared him down, screwing up his nose but not responding.

Rochelle touched my shoulder and I looked over slowly, I felt upset even more upset than when Keith and I lost our soccer ball but then I felt better because Keith found a can and we used that. I was just waiting for the feel better part. Rochelle started looking me up and down, checking for any wounds but I shook my head. She took my upper arm and pulled me over to the safe house stairs, leading to the way out and she sat me down, her face looked sympathetic but her posture was stern, she was rooted to the spot with her arms folded.

“You aren’t getting any ammo or extras until you tell me what the matter is,” She crouched down to me and I just looked back at her, hopelessly. She touched my face, turning it left and right, checking me. I felt like crying again but I wanted to prove I was stronger than that.

“Sweetie, you’re going to have to tell me,” She took my hand and squeezed it; I used my other hand to comb through my hair. I looked over at Nick, sitting in a corner of the room, reading the walls with such a miserable expression I felt worried. She saw me look and sudden annoyance took over her face.

“He didn’t hurt you, did he?” She growled, “Didn’t do anything to you?”

She squeezed my hand harder, “Did he break your heart of gold?” She frowned and I frowned back.

 “Oh sweetie,” She looked at me, full of sympathy then shot a nasty look at him. She sat next to me, in the tight space left on the step I was sitting on.

“Do you ever remember in elementary when people would say whoevers mean to you they like you and use it as a disguise?” I shook my head, though I knew exactly what she meant, I just don’t think that was the problem.

“He’s a con-man, don’t get involved, ok?” She said, patted my shoulder and she got up and let me replenish my items.

“Nick, get here!”  She hissed at him, he obediently picked himself up and slumped over to Ro. I could hear her telling him off and telling him to leave me alone, I ease dropped a little more as I restocked my ammo.

“Remember what we discussed before?” Rochelle asked him, he didn’t respond. The conversation was pretty one-sided.

“No matter how much you think you do, you don’t.” She stated.

“He’s extremely sensitive and you shouldn’t mess around like that.”

I took a step back and tried to stop listening, it was upsetting to hear so to distract myself I read the tagging on the walls. _CEDA sucks!_ I grunted and thought _I don’t see you doing anything to help, graffiti guy._ Coach and Rochelle went upstairs and Nick stayed on the stairs, head in his hands.

“I’m so scared; we don’t need this at the moment!” Rochelle murmured upstairs, “The worst part is I think the feelings mutual between them.”

“They have different ways of showing it,” Coach echoed through the floor, “Try keeping Ellis from him for a bit, he’s too young for this.”

 _Too young for this, too young for what, I’m not too young for anything!_ I thought _, I have been fighting god-damn zombies and they still think I can’t handle something, what a joke!_

I heard Nick mumble something to his self and sigh loudly, I frowned at the wall.


	5. Discoveries.

When Coach pulled off the metal bar barrier off the safe house door, he took it downstairs and blocked the other door with it, the one we came in. 

“What if other peoples wanna comin?” I asked him, watching him heave it up and fix it into place with a clunk. He looked over his buff shoulder at me as if I were being sarcastic but I stared at him, my lips were almost as thin as Nicks at this point. Coach turned around, fast, to walk back up the stairs and moved his eyes to look at me, he didn’t say anything but I think I made him mad, judging by the grim expression on his face and the way his big, bushy eyes screwed towards each other. He took himself up the stairs, each foot echoing a thump when he took a step _. I bet there are others_ , I thought, folding my arms, looking at the messy, meaningless scribbles on the walls.

Nick had moved from the stairs when I hadn’t been attentive to his presence. I walked up the stairs, my heavy boots also echoing a thump just as Coach’s dark grey trainers did. I spotted Rochelle, Coach and Nick all waiting by the door, Rochelle was holding her usual, brown patterned gun by her side and waved me over when she spotted me stomping up the stairs. I ambled over to her; she grinned at me and ordered me to ready my gun so I pulled my shotgun off my shoulder and held it tightly in my bloody drenched hands. She was still smiling when Coach pushed open the heavy door with a long scrap along the concrete and the hinges shrieked. Coach shoved Nick ahead of him and made sure Nick stayed with him whereas Rochelle made sure she was one step behind me always, they made it obvious that they didn’t want us to walk together but to themselves with their complete absurd emotion displays they had the idea that neither of us suspected a thing. I saw Nick ahead and guessed he figured it out as well, his black thin eyebrows angled downward and his eyes were thin slits with a speck of dull blue shining from the center only. _What did they think we were going to do? Tear each other apart?_  I thought and scoffed, kicking a rock into the back of Coach’s worn out running shoes and he glanced over at me, his lips stitched together and his face full of seriousness and I retreated slightly, slowing my pace dramatically.

Rochelle bumped into my back to eager me on, “Come on, sweetheart, nightfall’s coming and we all need sleep.”

I looked around at the sight; the sky was gradually paling into a soft grey colour and the bright sun concealed into a heap of depressing clouds. I pressed on with the others.

We arrived at a block of apartments, cars were scattered and smashed apart in the car park and an emptied fenced off pool. We stood on a rooftop, all pausing taking it in. Nick shot down the oblivious zombies with his rifle to clear the area first, easily. _How’d he ever miss in my dream then?_ I exhaled.

“Let’s get down here guys.” Nick plunged off the rooftop and I gasped, seeing him disappear before my eyes, it was easy to harm yourself jumping off heights or is ambushed by special infected so I rushed forward, past Coach and Rochelle and leapt off in a hurry to make sure he was alright. My gun strap spun and twisted as I fell and suddenly, I felt a shock run through my body and my hands and chest stung badly as I thumped face first onto the top of a broken down, blue bus, my shotgun thumped my back heavily and I groaned as I helped myself up and looked down my shirt, it was glowing bright red, enough to give off immense heat inside my shirt. To Rochelle and Coach it must’ve looked as if I was pushed off or slipped off because Coach jolted upright and spun around with his weapon readied and Rochelle rushed to the edge and yelled my name.

“I’m fine!” I yelled up to them and they both looked very relieved, Rochelle’s thin pencil eyebrows lowering and her smile softly painted back onto her face. I observed Nick climbing down from the bus and he looked back at me with large, puzzled eyes, he blinked at me and stayed paralyzed for a while, mid-way standing on an empty crate.

“Uh, you guys, I found the way down,” He stated, loudly before avoiding eye contact and hurried down the rest of the stacked items. I balanced myself and carefully stepped along the bus, a small tink when I stepped from the bus roof denting, Rochelle and Coach also jumped on with a loud bang and Coach apologized before tiptoeing. Nick waited, guarding the bus with his rifle at the ready.

“Good job Nick!” I said, smiling a large, cheesy smile at him, he glared at me and his thin, pale lips bloomed into a small smile. I paced over to Nick to stand by him but Coach hurdled himself off the bus and landed, releasing an oomph, and hurried himself off the concrete, stood in between us and dusted himself off. Nick slouched his shoulders and malice became his usual, recognizable emotion again, holding the rifle loosing with one hand and the strap desperately dug into his shoulder. I felt just as bummed as he did and a small sigh escaped my lips. Rochelle gently hopped off the smallest box and put her hands onto her hips, before shifting her weight onto her left foot.

“Well Nick and Coach, search the rooms, Ellis and I will set up a place for the night,” She said it sternly but she looked peaceful, she flipped her dark, dreadlocked ponytail and tilted her head, smiling. Coach hurried off, ordering Nick to keep up or he’ll leave him behind, and even then Nick looked a little hesitant. Rochelle nodded in the direction of a flight of stairs and we took our time.

“Ro, why can’t ah talk ta Nick?” I asked, out of the blue and she was taken aback, her thin fake brows arched up and she opened her mouth to say something but quickly shut it, shaking her head, her bangle earrings swaying.

“Are you nervous?” She asked me and I screwed up my nose.

“No, no, no, nawt like that!” I said, shocked, though really sometimes I do get nervous around him, he was intimidating but there was something else about him that made me muddle my words and get tongue twisted, “I was meaning, why don’t ya or Coach let me an’ Nick talk?” I asked, slightly sidetracked.

She looked at me, before looking down at the green, splotchy turf surface beneath our feet, “Uh, you can talk, we’re not stopping you.”

She didn’t even look at me after that but we heaved up the stairs in silence, only to hear Coach and Nick arguments in the distance.

“I’ll hold you to that and I will talk to Nick.” I stated, irritably and she let out a small, insistent sigh before we continued on in silence. Finally, Rochelle pushed open a door.

“I’ll check out what’s in here and you check out next door.” She commanded me and I obeyed, I took this as an opportunity to fix my recent hunter issue.

 I stepped over and leaned on the door, squeaking it open. It revealed a big, clean room of nothing but a small dresser table, a useless, disconnected TV and a large, flowery duvet coated bed, I bent over the bed and pushed myself onto it, lying down and I leant out a grateful sigh, sinking into the gentle folds of the duvet before getting up onto my feet with a chuckle. I walked over to the bathroom door, readied my weapon and kicked the door open. It smashed open, whacking the wall with a loud bang that echoed through the apartment blocks, nothing, there was absolutely nothing inside, well apart from a bath, a mirror and a sink. All of it was so untouched; I would’ve felt suspicious if I hadn’t been in such a hurry. I called for Rochelle and made her aware of my discovery. She strolled through the door, looking pleased before pulling a disgusted face and screwing up her face, she waved her hand in front of her face with watery eyes.

“Phew, what is that stench?!” She said, repulsed. I hadn’t noticed it until now but I pretended it didn’t bother me, I gagged slightly.

“Ah, well it wasn’t me,” I said, defensively and she looked at me, unimpressed before crouching beside the bed, she pulled up the blanket and almost vomited when she peered under the bed, her face turned a sickly, grey colour. She stood up and stormed out of the room yelling to get it out. I desperately gasped finally for a breath when she left but all I could smell was decomposing bodies and feral scents, I lifted up the blanket and saw a barely fleshy body, basically bones covered in bugs and allsorts. I reached under and felt for something stable to pull and I grabbed onto a firm feeling item and yanked, the whole body shuttered to the side with a clatter of bones and I kept pulling, nauseated. Finally I revealed the entire body, it was a skeletal figure, clutching onto a wooden cross, holding it so firmly the boney fingers stayed wrapped around it, desperately. I picked up the boney foot and began to drag it out of the room, leaving a trail of rotten flesh and maggots. I left it on the edge of the upper apartment block balcony and stared at it, I wanted to take the wooden, preciouses cross for myself but I felt he went through more to earn it then I did, so I let him continue to die for sins and I swerved my clunky boot towards him and he tumbled off into a pile of distorted bones, except for the cross which little pointy bones continued to treasure.

I returned and tried my best to rid of the flesh and maggots by kicking them out the door and scooping them up with bits of broken boxes, tossing out the door. I eventually collapsed, defeated, onto the bed in the dark room and lay there, the door was wide open but the only window was boarded up so I waited for Ro and the other two. 


	6. Memory lane. (Dedication to Keith.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On a side note, I do know how to spell everything, just Ellis' speech is so hard to adjust to give away its western without adding it after everything he says. Thanks for reading it everyone, I'll keep updating daily I hope.

I sat back up, positioned at the end of the bed. I clutched my hands together and put them in my lap, over my jumpsuit sleeves, knotted around my waist and nestled my hands as if they were independent. I gawked at the TV, placed on the dresser, it was pitch black and even when I pressed the button it didn’t give any hint of a glare of light.

I remembered sitting on the back of Keith’s truck, on top of an incredibly unstable crate, next to a dark, rubbish bag full of glass bottles and cans of beers, I had kicked my feet up onto a small, ruined TV, striking the antennae and it tumbled off the side the side of the truck, the cord whipping around as it rolled along the gravel. We were on the way to pick up my own truck, it had been wrecked earlier when Keith and I were having drag races in a nearby parking lot and I struck a pole with the side of the car, skidding and I really thought that those moments I was heaved out of the flaming heap and laid down on the pavement, gasping for air and clutching my lungs, I thought those were my last, I hadn’t cried then, I was in too much pain but I really thought I was going to die. Just in time a large siren whirred over the sounds of flames roaring and Keith’s panic but I had been treated immediately. I don’t remember much but I remember how scared I was and how brave I was trying to be. I remembered when we reached the repair store I jumped out the back of Keith’s truck and rushed to my fixed, burgundy truck and kissed its hood.

“I ain’t gone do nuddin’ like that ‘gain, baby, I’m sorry,” I kept repeating, driving it home, trailing behind Keith’s truck. The only thing I could see the whole drive home was the small TV tumbling around in the back and I never knew why he had it in there, even now I still don’t know. That whole story was almost one year before this whole mess started. When the first report of it happened Keith and I lounging on the back of my truck with our feet kicked up, we were listening to a radio and an urgent warning came on about staying inside or something.  Being the idiots that we were, I jumped into my truck and he swung into the side passenger seat, kicking his feet through the empty cans and junk and we started up the car. “How many of them idiots do ya fink fell fer it?” He sniggered saying to me, he had a hat like my own, just a darker green colour and his ginger, disgusting hair stuck out from under it, he always had hat hair. We roamed around through the empty streets and his face kept a smile, shaking his head, calling everything an idiot whereas I started to get a little nervous. I insisted we turn back and he called me a chicken for a bit, before giving in himself and we drove back. He pointed out the window at a homeless woman, searching through the tin, council bin.

“Ay lady, isn’t yew aware of dis whole shit?” He yelled at her and her back straightened slowly, before her tilted head turned around with the rest of her. She had blood all down her face and pinafore, her skin was pale and rotten and Keith gasped, “Oh no, no, no, no, dis is for real man, we gotta go!”

He rolled up the window in a hurry and told me to step on the gas, I did and we raced all the way back to our garage. He looked anxious and pressed the garage button and it clunked around, loudly, before slowly lowering and the homeless lady sprinted towards us, huddled in our garage.

“Oh shit man, she was onto us!” He yelled at me, I picked up a wrench from the toolbox and stood by the garage door. It got midway before getting stuck, Keith panicked and began slamming his fists onto it, she was getting closer, gradually and we could smell the disgusting rotting flesh from here. Keith kept banging and it made a loud shuttering noise, the woman dove under it and it fell, fast, landing on her body, parting her. She lay there and Keith had taken his hat off and ran his hands through his hair, there was a pool of blood around the woman and we stared in disbelief. He looked over at me, his ginger brows arched upwards in the middle and his mouth stayed open. A loud shriek came from by our feet and the woman’s torn up face looked up at me and she squirmed still trapped, she was immobile but Keith still shrieked louder than she and pounced onto the back of the truck and I stayed staring down at her, emotionless. I knew her, she was homeless indeed, but she was a lovely lady and occasionally I would give her a few dollars or some leftovers, she would never harm anyone but now I stood looking down at her, her greying hair was missing pieces and the rest was lathered in blood, her torn mouth kept screaming and she was desperately grasping with her undead hands for my jumpsuit trousers.

“Kill it,” Keith cried, hiding behind the truck, shaking and squealing hysterically. I leaned down and held my wrench, shakily and lined it up with her head, being careful.

“Don’t you be gettin’ bit or you will be one of them thingys!” Keith yelled at me. I sighed, gosh he was unhelpful sometimes, I looked over and saw him, clinging onto the roof of my truck and flailing his arms dramatically. The little light bulb above him began to flicker and I fretted there would soon be no source of light. Suddenly, a hand grasped onto my forearm and pulled me down to a great extent, I screamed and tried to retrieve my strength but it was too late her mouth had chomped down into my forearm and I swung, in a panic, splashing her brains onto my indigo, denim jumpsuit and splattered it along the cold, hard floor.

I stared at my forearm, little dentures of teeth marks had drew blood and trickled onto the floor, I was in shock. Keith hurried over.

“No man, you wasn’t ‘posed to be eaten at yet, we was gonna have a big ‘venture and be zombie killing machines,” He said, I looked at him with my mouth slightly open, he was close to tears and he wanted to come close but he knew to keep him distance. I stepped away from him and pushed my back against a wall.

“Keith, you’s going to hav’ ta follow ma instrucked shons, I don’t want ya ter have ter kill me,” I said and I threw my wrench across the floor at him. He nodded, picked up the wrench in shaky hands and a little dribble fell out of the corner of his baby blue eyes, he looked terribly sad when he cried so I tried to hurry, it would make him worse to see me cry and I felt it coming on, a huge knot in my stomach was forming and a lump in my throat gave my voice a quaver. He stood on the opposite side of the truck.

“Get in ma baby,” I started and he looked as if he was going to protest before I screwed my button nose up and he pulled on the handle, clicking the door open.

“Chuck me the re-moat for the garage dur,” I continued and he filled out my orders by tossing me the small, black, shiny remote with two grey buttons on it, it landed on the floor and skidded across, stopping at my feet.

“Start ‘er up and head to that hidden farming evac center out west that we found ackidently, when we was playing around in that corn field, ‘member?” I said to him and he smiled, before nodding and sobbing loudly.

“Almost got our bloody heads blown off!” He laughed, tears still tumbling down his flushed red cheeks.

“Getton that funky planey thing and fly to safety with whomever, ok Keith.” I ordered, he looked at me and just stared with great hesitation, but eventually he slid into the driver’s seat, looking through his windscreen at me, he gave a small wave and continued crying, gosh he was emotional. I choked down tears and waved back, smiling.

“God bless yew, Keith, I love ya, brother!” I yelled to him, I held the remote in my sweaty palm and he cried harder, waving motioning hugely and started the car. The purr filled the garage and I pressed the button, the garage door shucked and began rolling upwards.

“I love yew tew, Ellis, see yew in heaven ma brother!” He yelled back at me, revving the engine and roared out of the garage, skidding through the car park, a toxic, grey cloud coughed out behind him and he raced down the street.

I pressed the button and the garage door, repeated itself and unraveled, slamming down. I began to cry. Hot tears streamed down my face and I snorted, sniffled and sobbed into my knees. I cried until I got a headache, it was built up for so long and after everything ever, I truly felt upset and couldn’t stop crying. I didn’t want to die and I kept telling myself that but my arm was a stinging, blood dried pain and it filled me with secret denial and I had convinced myself, deep inside, this was my death bed and I was going to be found in an exhausted, undead heap, devouring things I’d never even smell without gagging.

I felt like that until I fell asleep, I had exhausted myself and fell asleep with my head on a toolbox, curled up in a ball, sniffling even in my sleep. It was the worst sleep I had ever had.


	7. Overnight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter isn't that great, I felt sick yesterday and partially today so I didn't put in a lot of effort. The next chapter is already started and it'll be a better one than today's, I know it.

“Hey, day dreamer, wake up.” A snap of fingers brought me back to reality in a daze. Coach stood over me, shadowing me, with his torch shining in my eyes, blinding me.

“Ah’m immune! Yer immune, wearal immune, oh boy, Keith ain’t ever gone guess what!” I ranted before adjusting to my surroundings and I suddenly looked around, astonished. Nick was sitting on the floor in the corner, silently, with Rochelle. The door had been blocked off with the dresser and other items Nick and Coach had hauled from their search, including a lot of crates and another dresser. Everyone looked exhausted.

“Great, now shut the fuck up,” Nick spat, holding his head, I guessed he had a headache, I don’t blame him though, Coach’s loud, booming voice was enough to make my head throb even now.

“Oh, sorry,” I mumbled. Coach straightened up and nodded over to Rochelle.

“Well Nick has volunteered to stay up since he’s had the most sleep, so we need to sort out our sleeping arrangements,” Coach told me in his husky voice, he settled down onto the bed, parking himself beside me, he sunk down greatly and I almost slid into him. Half my face smiled and I offered to sleep on the ground, pretending it was just as comfortable.

“You two could share the bed, I mean, it’d just be awkward any other way,” I announced, doing my best fake laugh and Coach nodded, appreciatively. I got up and motioned to the corner of the room, on the opposite side of the bed to Ro and Nick, Coach got up as well and began stripping the bed while I talked.

“I’ll stay over here, I mean, it’s okay because one time Keith had left me and I was stuck in a garage and I slept on the floor!” I told them, I hadn’t told them the rest of the story I couldn’t do that. “It wasn’t that uncomfortable, I had a pretty good sleep!” I lied, grinning widely and Rochelle was the only one to smile, even the slightest bit, back. Coach had passed me the flowery duvet and a flowery pillow and I settled them down on the floor. Nick sniggered, staring at my set up with a rather offensive look, but I ignored him. Coach lay the dark, soft blue sheet and the white, cushiony under-duvet onto the bed, he tossed Nick the left over blanket and Nick only kept it bundled up next to him. Rochelle looked exhausted and Coach’s torch gave horrible definition to her bags under her eyes, she crawled up to the bed and sat on it, undoing her black, knee high leather boots, lazily, and she reminded me to take my own off. I began unlacing my big, worker boots, slowly and Coach stood on the heel of his trainers and slipped it off, repeating the same with the other foot. It was an extremely slow procedure for them to get into bed considering how sleep-deprived they were. I crawled into the corner of the room, sat my pillow up and wrapped the blanket around me, I didn’t feel tired yet but I still got into my overnight do up. Coach switched out his light and the whole room became pitch black. I stared into the darkness, frowning, I hadn’t realized it would be this dark.

A while later, Coach’s loud snoring awashed any other noises and I still sat upright and gawked the darkness. I felt now would be the best time to talk to Nick so I got on all fours, cloaked myself in the duvet and slowly shuffled around, trying to guide my way by feeling objects. I eventually touched a soft, fur-like surface, Nick’s blanket and to my surprise it moved at my presence and I lurched away.

“Huh?” A low voice growled, I reached out and touched the blanket, coming closer.

“Who is it?” Nick demanded, quietly, feeling around also. I accidentally brushed against Nick’s hand before returning to it, quick and grasping it, pulling myself closer to him and wriggling up next to him, my duvet squishing him, softly. He pushed it away, ever so slightly.

“Ellis?” He whispered, in a slightly shaky voice. I couldn’t see him but I definitely knew it was him.

“Yeah,” I said, feeling like I was a disappointment for him. Swiftly, Nick dug his arms under my duvet and he wrapped them around me before pulling me into his chest.

“This is bullshit,” He said, quietly into my ear as I spread my duvet across the both of us.

“Ah’m sorry, Ah’m notta very good hugger,” I mumbled and he snickered before stopping fast and letting out disheartening sigh. He stayed quiet for a long time and I draped my muscly arms around him and squeezed, pushing myself closer to him. He wasn’t wearing his typical, doctor-like coat, so I could feel his ribs in the side of his body, we didn’t eat much but I didn’t realize Nick was this starved, constantly, his coat hid it all and he wasn’t the type to complain unless it was about business, then he wouldn’t shut up with his swearing and foul language.

“What am I to you, Ellis?” Nick whispered out of the blue, “What do I mean to you?” His voice was dull and his fingers curled into my t-shirt and grasped pieces of my t-shirt tightly in either hand, and he sighed again.

I began to stutter, I didn’t really think about that until now. Nick meant a lot to me, I hadn’t realized it before but if Nick had ever died earlier on, I don’t think I could live with myself I would blame myself and gosh, I do need Nick.  Nick’s always there for me but I’m never there for him, I’m always the one provoking special infected and always thinking last. I really liked Nick, possibly even like that but I’m scared of what he’ll think, maybe he misses his ex-wife and I’ll look like an idiot. Nick’s chest rose up and down in time with his breathing, soft inhales and exhales.

“I like yew, Nick,” I finally said, he didn’t sound very impressed because he exhaled loudly and went silent. “Why? Does it matter?” I asked, quietly, shutting my eyes. I pulled my legs up and leaned them against Nick, pulling the duvet with me. I felt his dress shirt shift up and back down with his shoulders; he had shrugged and loosened his grip on me, so I tighten mine on him. I wanted to fall asleep but I was afraid of what Ro and Coach would say so I let go and shuffled the other way into the wall and squashed up against it, cloaking myself in my duvet and nestling down into it, my hat knocked off and rolled off onto the floor somewhere but I knew I would find it in the morning so I tried to sleep.

Majority of the night I couldn’t and all I could hear was Nick trying to stay awake, tapping away at his rifle with his ring making a dinging noise or Coach’s loud snoring, sometimes in moments like these I forget about Rochelle, my bigger sister I never had. I felt a shock to myself when I realized that I could have seen these people before in my life but gone un-noticed, especially Coach considering we both were born and raised here in Savannah but  it wasn’t until now their wellbeing and presence entirely mattered to me. We all had to be there for each other, otherwise, we were one less immune and a lot less hope. I needed these people a lot, I’m not sure if I was all that necessary to them but I relied on them greatly. Throughout all this thinking, I dozed off finally.


	8. Lone wolf.

The sound of gun fire awoke me in a shock, my heart bet rapidly and I jolted upright. My dirty, blonde hair was in bed head state but I kicked off my duvet in a hurry. The hotel room was empty; Nick’s blanket was bundled up next to me, Coach and Ro’s bed was left in a mess and the barrier against the door had been thrown around, I felt rather surprised I had slept through the commotion. I laced up my boots and got to my feet and looked around for my hat, checking under the bed and beneath piles of blankets.

“Oh god!” I heard Rochelle shrill from outside, followed by more gun fire. I picked up my shotgun and ran out in a hurry onto the veranda. The breeze was tremendously noticeable, running through my hair, sweeping it around on my head. I looked around but could see none of them so I turned the corner and began to run down a flight of steps when the floor collapsed underneath my feet with a loud rumble and I fell, landing harsh on my side, my ribs ached and I gasped desperately for air, I got up winded but soldiered on. I kicked my way out of the pile of broken turf and railings before limping to fencing; there were no zombies in sight or the others so I continued to hold myself up on the fence, still panting in pain. I felt around my waist, wheezing, hoping for pain pills before remembering I had given the others them so I hobbled onward to find them, clutching my side. I checked around the other stairs slowly before sitting down to hopefully regenerate some health and breath; I pushed myself down against the wall and gritted my teeth, in pain. I ran my hand through my hair and gasped when I felt my empty head, revealed to the harsh winds, tossing my hair around, messing it up. I just hoped one of the others had my precious hat for me.

I managed to stumble back onto my feet and shift past other run-down apartment blocks before coming to step-stones; I could still hear gunfire in the distance so I chose to follow it. I paced along the path, carefully, clasping my side, and it reached a steep hill.

“Oh man,” I said to myself quietly looking down at a slightly smaller than usual horde of living-dead, hobbling left and right. They had quick senses so I made sure to be quiet and prepared, I stepped forward to go down the hill slowly but my footing slid fast and I tumbled down onto a small camp ground, fenced off, lying on my back. A few guns were scattered and there was a small, handled lantern, sitting beside a plaid sleeping bag, blood was smeared all over it. I shifted onto my side and I shook my head sympathetically before tracing the gore trail to me, I gasped and felt my back, it stung badly and it was damp, when I retrieved my hand it was varnished in red. I helped myself up quickly and tried to stop the bleeding as best as I could by holding my hand down on the graze, putting pressure on it. I was a wreck and I knew I was hopeless without the others so I tried to hurry to them. I belatedly stopped the bleeding but I couldn’t stop the pain, the next pain pills I found I knew I had to take the bottle full. I leaned over the fencing, looking down at the crowd of zombies, I didn’t want to waste my first aid kit so I didn’t and instead I pelleted a Molotov over the side, yelling to attract their attention and a loud roar kicked up, red, orange and yellow flames propelled heat immensely, I immediately thought of my previous car wreck and gave withdrawal from the side of the fence. Heads turn and fast movement raced towards me and unsuspected, crossed throw the fire in panic and fell to the ground, decaying back to their original state. I still held my shotgun, alarmed, tightly to my chest, aiming at the entrance of the short, picket fencing. Once it died down and the smell of crisp flesh invaded my nostrils I carried on out of the fencing, I tried to balance against the hill before tottering backwards and scooting all the way down, I puffed in hysteria getting onto my feet.

“Ro?” I choked through the lingering ash, loudly. The swamp was the only way across so I slowly slopped my feet through, sloshing disgustingly, it was deserted and there were many lifeless dead around, face down in the water, a trail of bullet shells lay around, streaming down another hill on the opposite side. I staggered through the muddy water and gimped, uselessly, up the hill.

A large, lit up ticket safe house booth lay ahead at the top of the hill in an isolated parking lot only containing an orange, flashing car, a small, blue car and a large white truck out front, it had pain pills inside and I rushed, hitching myself over and snatching them, I unscrewed the cap desperately as I had delaying in extravagant pain and consumed the remaining few pills in a single gulp, fiercely choking them down. Relief flooded my body and I began to ignore my limp, still feeling a little weak I jaunted to the shut door of the safe room. I grabbed the handle and pulled, it made no opening but it shuddered, loudly, a metal bar clanking on the other side.

“No, no, no!” I yelled and slammed my fists onto the door, “C’mon open up! Ah ain’t no brain-ater, Ah’m immune!” My voice was shaky and I broke out in a sweat. I could hear movement inside and low whispers but I kept yelling. I grasped the bars and shook, quaking my entire body with the movement.

“Please! Coach, Nick, Rochelle?” I wailed through the bars, “Guys, c’mon y’know it’s me Ellis!” I began getting choked up and hopeless; tears blurred my vision until there was nothing more than a large, red splotch in my sight. I coughed, loudly before slamming my fist onto the door. I began crying.

“No, please, I dunt wanna die, you guys!” I sobbed, hitting the door with one clenched fist until it turned bright red and I switched over. I heard the other door open and slam shut again and any sign of life had dissipated. I fell to the ground in a big, emotional heap and sobbed, wiping my tears viciously.

“Good fer nuffin’ team, leaving me like ah dunt matter,” I muttered, angrily to myself, clearing my tears away with a sweep of my hand every now and then. I hadn’t realized they’d leave me so easily, maybe they didn’t believe it was me or I was just a burden for them to carry. I had warned Coach to not put the bar up and now I was sitting here, crying and officially giving up, leaving myself there to rot. Throughout this misadventure I had been drained slowly of my glee and consistent cheerfulness, they’d believed I was annoying but I didn’t realize I was annoying enough to abandon, I probably would abandon me too. I felt empty as I sat there sulking staring at my overalls, picking at a thread, I would sniff every now and then and wipe the remaining tears from my soft, pink cheeks. The silence became enough to kill me, I groaned to myself, trying to think through a plan before a distant sobbing shocked me, paralyzing me in my place _. Ah shit, anything but this now please_ , I thought desperately, I almost got onto my knees and prayed for life before the sobbing began to be comforted with a low, grumbly voice. I looked up and focused on the top of the hill. To my surprise, a dark headed figure appeared in a familiar white coat, alongside him was a smaller, South African woman, sobbing with her hands holding her face and stomping behind them was a larger, black man, scowling between the two. I stared at them in extreme disbelief, before hustling onto my feet. Rochelle looked at me and squealed sobbing, loudly, towards me. I rushed towards them, tears running along the side of my face and I began wiping them away, fast before they noticed and I smiled, weakly. Rochelle grabbed my arms and jerked me towards her, pulling me into a hug. She finally released and patted me up and down, tutting compassionately.

“You’re a wreck!” She said, she reached behind her for a first aid kit before pausing and sighing, tenderly, realizing she didn’t have one so she nodded at my own, “You’d better heal up quick.”

I shook my head, “I’m okay.” I assured her but she raised one eyebrow before giving in and strutting towards the safe house with attitude, I didn’t tell her about the safe house I figured they could find out themselves.

A soft hand pressed my shoulder and I spun around, briskly. Nick stood and blinked, his eyebrows were arched downward and he sniffed his nose, he looked as if he was going to say something to me but instead he pulled his hand up from the side of his body and in his grasp was my precious hat, I looked at it and grinned widely.

“Nick,” I paused, staring at it, “Thank you.” I didn’t take it but he must’ve been tired of waiting for me to because he fixed it onto my head, pulling the bill down and causing my shaggy hair to come down with it, brushing in front of my face. I laughed, revealing my face again and I was blushing, I tried to hide but he smirked at me before joining Rochelle. Coach stared at me with an eyebrow raised and I tilted my hat down to hide my face, nervously.

“I’m glad you’re okay, little brother.” He commented and I looked up, he was smiling widely at me and I grinned back. “I’d love to hear this story sometime, eh?” He laughed, he nodded over at the other two walking ahead and recommended we catch up, I smiled but couldn’t help but feel guilty about the door, flustered about Nick and anxious about whatever I had heard in the safe house but I continued to listen to the thump of our footsteps, kicking gravel and stayed silent.


	9. Rochelle's matter.

I stared down at the concrete, kicking a small pebble around with my boot.

“Ellis?!”

Rochelle’s voiced barked, sternly, louder than anything else for miles. It echoed down the steep hill they emerged from and slipped through fencing, crawling onward. I flinched, just at the noise and I couldn’t look at her, but I could hear her shoes, clicking extremely out of time with each other, before Rochelle’s leather black boots became the only thing I could see and they came to a halt with a loud clop. A cold shiver trailed down my spine and I looked up at her, her thin pencil eyebrow furrowed together and her plump, crimson lips were downturned. I opened my mouth to explain but she cut in before I could say anything.

“You did this, Ellis?” She hissed, she folded her arms tightly against her chest, “Ellis, I can’t believe you!”

“Ah didn’t do nuddin’!” I said, loudly, in panic. I hated when Rochelle was angry at me, especially when she blames me for something I didn’t do.

“Yeah, then what happened?” She began to yell and Nick turned his attention towards us, alarmed, his dark eyebrows arched upwards. Rochelle shot a malicious glare at Nick when he looked as if he’d contribute to the conversation and he retreated, brushing down his coat, trying to play it off.

“Ah can explain,” I started but Rochelle stomped away and I froze. She tried pulling at the door again and a loud chunk told us it was still blocked off; she looked over at me.

“Well c’mon, let’s all settle down and take our time,” She began sarcastically, waving her arms around, “For Ellis to tell us, there are no serious threats around at all in the world so c’mon, Ellis, clever boy!” She spat viciously and tilted her head, threateningly. I pouted, blinking, trying not to cry again. _I don’t need to cry_ , I thought to myself, supportively. She still looked mad but a look of realization shot on her face and she must’ve pieced together how upset I was, even Coach was taken aback at Rochelle’s actions.

“Now hold on!” A voice interrupted through the commotion and Nick stepped forward between Rochelle and I, he stood with a firm posture facing Rochelle. Throughout, Coach refused to interfere and stood on the sidelines with his arms crossed, shocked by the whole display.

“First of all,” Nick began, scowling, he definitely had a fiercer look than Rochelle could ever, “Don’t you talk to him like that, okay, he’s sensitive,” He said, growling loudly.

“Secondly,” He gestured his hand towards the blocked safe house door, “Why the fuck do you think he would do that shit?”

He didn’t let Rochelle get a single word in, “Thirdly, don’t you tell me not to disrespect this little fucker and then you can go off at him like that, hypocritical bitch,” Nick snarled, Rochelle flinched at the word, bitch, and frowned, angrily.

“And lastly, don’t you even fucking think you and Coach are being secretive about your whole game going, we know, so don’t tell me what the fuck to do with this little kid, okay?” He said, casually and he fixed his sleeve. I felt myself flush crimson. Nick stepped away finally and I coward back, slowly, he strolled back to his original point by the door and began fiddling around with it, leaving Rochelle in a state of disbelief.

“You don’t even fucking know me,” Nick mumbled, slotting bits into the door.

Rochelle gawked at Coach, his chocolate eyes wide open and staring back, he didn’t look as skeptic as Rochelle did but he had loosen his folded arms a tad and blushed slightly. I felt worse than both of them because Ro stared me down as if it were my fault, I wanted to tell them about the other people I heard but the tensions were too high and I began sweating greatly. It was cloudy and cool with the wind brushing against me, but I still felt hot, fanning myself with my typical trucker hat.  

A loud bang of metal clanging startled us all; especially in our sketchy states we were in already. Nick had put his previous learnt experience tricks to work to push the bar off the door; up and over, using tools he refused to show us and the safe house door lay, widely open. He patted his navy, blue dress shirt’s pocket and when we all struck our attention to him, his eyes were thin, malevolent slits staring at us.

“They definitely underestimate me,” Nick fumed under his breath, rolling his eyes at our surprised expressions. Rochelle straightened up, cleared her throat and stormed past Nick into the safe house, I could hear her begin to rant about the other door being left open; she wasn’t in a very good mood today. Nick didn’t even look at her but dully stared into the room from the outside and internally blocked Rochelle’s complaints, not paying attention to anything and Rochelle slammed the outward door shut. A sudden firm pat on the back tried to eager me onward and Coach stood by my side, looking down at me.

“Ellis, I’d like to hear your story now,” He said, he wasn’t smiling but he wasn’t frowning. His voice was gentle and inviting and he clearly wanted to know what was going on desperately; he gave me time to think it through. We began walking towards the open, heavy, crimson door when I organized my speech.

“Well when y’all left me in the morn’,” I began to tell him but Coach opened his mouth to interfere but shut it, shook his head and let me continue, “Ah was wonderin’ ‘round for y’all, tryna find ya, ah fell through stairs, ah fell down a hill and finally found somma them pain pill thingys, ah mean ah didn’t wanna waste the only first aid,” I told him, he stared at me blankly as we walked at an extremely slow pace.

“Anywho, ah was comin’ up dat hill yonder there and ah saw tha’ door shut and ah tried to open it but it was locked and ah heard somma them voices of survivors inside, they was tryna be quiet and decide to let me in or nah but ah thought it was y’all so ah was bangin’ on tha door, cr-” I paused and decided to skip that part about crying, Coach’s opinion on me was highly important, “Bangin’ on tha door and then they left through the other door and then y’all come up outta nowhere ‘n’ ah get a big shock, cos ah thought y’all ditched me and ah was-” I stopped, the silence taking over when we finally reached the room and Coach continued to think things through, quietly nodding, he was being unusually nice to me but I didn’t want to ruin it by becoming suspicious so I kept peaceful. Nick continued to lean on the door frame staring at a shelf, he was zoned out and when he regained focus, he yawned widely and heaved the safe house door shut. We all sat in silence before Rochelle broke the silence.

“Well, what happened to all the stuff, Ellis, did you take it all for yourself?” hissed Rochelle, she kept picking on me today, what did I do wrong to her? I was too obedient towards her to be treated like this. She screwed her nose up at me and I stepped back when she got closer, reversing myself so far I pressed my back up against the wall and she stared down at me. She held her sharp index finger pointing it at me, I expected her to pounce on me as if a hunter would.

“No he didn’t, there were others here,” Coach boomed in the background and Rochelle froze in front of me, slowly rotating to face Coach. She scowled at him, straightening up.

“Don’t be absurd, Coach, there are no others,” She said, trying to keep her patience with Coach but he kept to our side of the argument.

“There’s no other explanation, Rochelle.” He stated and she looked offended, her eyes widening and looking at him side-on. I stayed against the wall and looked over at Nick, he had leant against the door we had shut after he replaced the bar onto it and was staring at the wall, not particularly reading or focusing, his dull blue eyes looked almost dead.

The room went silent and slight sound echoed through the hollowed room. Rochelle finally spun back around to me, I expected some kind of apology when she stayed straight faced, her eyebrows relaxed and mouth not particularly angled but instead she rooted her feet to the ground in front of me and I stayed up against the wall, today she really did terrify me. Her whole face drooped into a scowl and Coach sighed, irritated, shaking his head. She shot out her hand in front of me, fast causing me to flinch at such rapid movement and held it there, palm side up.

“Hand over the first aid,” She ordered and I gasped, quietly, even Nick regained his attention.

“You clearly can’t be trusted with it and will waste it!” She snapped, shifting her weight to one foot; this was definitely not the Rochelle I had spent the past weeks with, something was wrong.

“Hey, he still has it, doesn’t he?” Nick interrupted, growling fiercer than Rochelle, “He limped all the way here and has gone through hell to take nothing but a small bottle of pills and you’re here accusing him of wasting it!”

Rochelle stared at Nick, fury burning in her eyeliner outlined eyes but Nick stayed leaning against the door, folding his arms with his thin lips pursed together.

“What is your problem, Rochelle?” He hissed and she jumped forward as if she wanted someone to say that. I had slipped the first aid off my back when she began to have a go at Nick. The two never really got along, especially when it was over me; they had always been at each other’s throats using any excuse to attack one another. He completely ignored the smaller South African woman ranting at him and shook his thin shaped head at me, releasing a few tuffs of hair from the gels grip. I held the first aid in my hands and he raised an eyebrow so I slipped my arms through the straps and fixed it onto my back again.

“Do you have your period?” Nick hissed with a smug look, as if he was trying to rile her up and she snapped.

“I haven’t had time for that shit, I’ve been so unhealthy so it’s been delaying,” She began, fuming; her dark cheeks turning a darker, crimson shade, Nick intruded her sentence.

“Maybe you’re pregnant to…” He paused and winked before scowling, right in her face as if an animalistic way of saying back off but Rochelle stepped forward and lashed her hand across his pale face, leaving a radiating red hard print, it happened fast and the sound of the harsh contact with his cheek echoed loudly, looping for too long. Rochelle stepped back and stomped away from him and Nick shook his head, feeling the side of his face. Coach sighed again and stayed in his place, on the sidelines.

“You know what?” Rochelle yelled at all of us, staring in disbelief. She pushed the door open and turned around to face us.

“I will tell you what’s the matter, but none of you really care.” She moped, strolling out the door, desperate for attention and Coach scowled under his breath before following her out. I began to walk forward, through the door when Nick grasped my shirt in two hands and hauled myself close to him, collaring me in a way.

“Don’t let them push you around,” He told me, his face was only a few centimeters from my own. I blushed, heavily and blinked, “Okay?” He said, trying to assure me and I nodded, shaking my dirty gold locks up and down. He finally let go and paced out the door, I fixed my hat before racing out, trying to catch up. The wind danced around me, welcomingly, as I exited the looted safe room, it was almost as if this whole apocalypse wasn’t happened but I always reminded myself that it did and I’d become a little blue, just as I did then. A soft voice called out suddenly.

“Oh, Rochelle, I-I’m… I’m sorry.”


	10. Goddammit Overalls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while, I've been so distracted with school and people, etc. Here it is finally, it might be a while for new chapters to come out but you'll all been so patient thank you!

Coach was using his comforting voice and when I looked ahead he had his arm over Rochelle’s shoulder, he was mumbling things to her and she kept sobbing, rubbing at the tears harsh. Nick walked a little while behind me, defending the end and Coach and Rochelle had weapons in their hands, not necessarily using them greatly, pushing through the front and I was just some guy, some middle that didn’t really matter, I was some second choice and it sucked. It was always that way, I had assumed because they couldn’t trust me but they wouldn’t tell me otherwise. I pulled my own gun close to my chest and slid a glance at Nick, he was reloading patiently and I kicked over a small object that made a loud dink, I looked down and picked it up, it was a pipe bomb so I slipped it into my pocket.

We all passed under an amusement park sign, brightly light in glittery litters spelling out, “Whispering oaks.” I knew this place, it was extremely familiar to me and a sudden thought struck me.

“Oh shit, yew guys ah know where we is!” I said excited as I thought of when I was a little kid. “Ain’t them midnight ridas ‘pposed ta play?” I looked around, ogling the sights I remember.

Nick stared at me with his eyebrows scrunched almost together and his lips thin pressed together; he didn’t say anything but he looked at me with such an offensive look. Rochelle and Coach even turned around, she gave me a spiteful glare as her mascara began to smear along the bags of her eyes but Coach looked fairly excited but disappointed, us two being the only two to grow up in Savannah we knew and treasured much more than the other two. Coach caught sight of Rochelle’s face and hustled her around, moving them further forward. I turned slightly to look at Nick and pulled a confused expression, he only shook his head sympathetically before mumbling something that I barely heard.

“I don’t think they’ll be here, Ellis.”

I frowned and didn’t respond; I just turned forward and clutched my shotgun tightly. I listened to the stomps of my boots clunking down one after another, Coach’s sports trainers skid along gravel paths still making a loud blunt thumping noise, Nick’s formal dress shoes clink barely hearable behind me and Rochelle’s high heels clop loudly, echoing through the whole amusement park. We passed so many closed booths that I remembered always being open.

“Ah remember this time Keith ‘n’ ah almost robbed a corn dog stand ‘cos, like, Keith wanted ketchup ‘n’ they says he had ta pay but he dinny wanna so he grabbed the bottle and, like, started squeezin’ it everywhere, it even got all over ma shoe,” I paused, looking down and inspecting my boots, “But, like, just in time ah pulled out ma money and handed it ov’r while Keith wis runnin’ ‘way, he was-”

Nick hushed me violently and Coach and Rochelle crouched, silently, holding up their weapons ready. I primed my shotgun into a ready position and scanned around; Coach squinted his eyes and whispered back at us.

“I could have sworn I heard-” Rochelle’s loud scream broke through his sentence and she was being ridden around by a small, deformed creature, she kept yelling kill it as it steered her around. Coach began flailing his gun and trying to shot it without harming Rochelle, his eyes were wide and he pulled out his machete to swing at nearby zombies with.   


“Ellis!” A voice yelped, Coach sprinted around the corner following down Rochelle and I spun around, in a daze. To my surprise, Nick was dangling a few feet off the ground with a long, slimy, ropey tongue and he continued to slowly be lifted. A horde of zombies stood around him, waving their arms around furiously. I began to shoot down the horde before feeling around my waist, I felt a circular item and I yanked it out of my pocket.

“Aha!” I held it up, proudly before setting it on and launching it as far as I could; the decomposing bodies began to rip their attention from Nick, the human piñata and raced after the loud beeping noise, also attracting some other hidden common infected. I began to shot furiously at the smoker and its tongue as I could hear the small bleeping noise speeding up, Nick’s face was turning a pink colour and his dull blue eyes looked down at me desperately, I began shooting faster and when I saw the smoker’s grip loosen I saw the chance and pulled the trigger pointed at its tongue. A small depressing click replaced the sound of a bullet being fired, I urgently began to try replenishing my ammo but I remembered I didn’t have any as there were no more piles in the safe house. A loud bang went off afar and body parts flew everywhere, firing themselves at the smoker, startling it. I gasped looking at Nick and the smoker’s grip had dropped him a bit but it was regaining its strength so hurried over to him. I sprinted at my fastest and stretched for his hand; I gripped it and pulled at him, wheezing. He looked exhausted as he tried to struggle, constricted, I heaved mightier and the smoker began to lose its patience, its tongue became wearier and wearier as did Nick. Once I could reach I swung at the tongue, grasping it, its slimy and dirty texture was all I could feel and I tugged it, trying to free Nick. Eventually the tongue gave way and dropped Nick to the ground lifelessly and with a loud sigh and the smoker groaned, echoing, sprinting away on the rooftop, its cloud of toxic gas trailing it. I looked down at Nick, exhausted, curled up in a heap on my feet and I leaned down. I touched his back and his breathing was unsteady, I crouched down and tilted my head to see his face, his eyes were shut and he was gasping for breath again. He slid a small look sideways at me and I was staring with large eyes and my face, pale and brooding, his thin lips stretched towards his ear, smirking with a half-smile. He blinked his grey eyes at me before telling me he was alright in a quiet, uneasy voice. He pushed himself up shakily and I helped him get onto his feet.

I stared at him _, boy he’s brave_ , I thought to myself watching the middle aged man hobble onto his feet in obvious pain, he was bleeding in places and had large gashes over his chest from the tongue, I remembered how I had passed when a hunter pinned me down and I touched my chest where it had clawing viciously at me, it stung but it wasn’t as bad as before. He stumbled over to a merry-go-round and leaned on the thigh high fencing just as Coach and Rochelle came out from the other corner, Coach had blood splattered all down his front and Rochelle had it all down her back, she mumbled angrily something about stupid jockeys, rubbing at her shoulders. Coach caught sight of Nick limping around, catching himself on things just in time and he rushed over to help him.

I stood and watched, glad we had defended ourselves from one wave at least but then felt guilty I hadn’t saved Nick any sooner, he looked grateful when I heaved him onto his feet though. A small cough grumbled beside me and I looked around startled, Rochelle stood with one hand over her mouth and the other stricken around her waist. She spun her head quick and stared at me, she looked unimpressed but her face soften and she began to look as embarrassed as she had when I figured out her and Coach for myself. She managed to eventually mumble something.

“Sorry,” She said quietly, I smiled and shrugged.

“It’s ‘kay, Ro, you was jast panicked ‘sall,” I reassured her but she came closer to me and put her arm around my waist.

“No sweetie, it’s not okay, I was stupid and you shouldn’t just forgive people so easily,” She tried telling me but I shrugged again, unsure of what was wrong with forgiving people.

“Nah, it’s a zombie invayshon, no way is ah holdin’ eny grudges!” I laughed, giving Rochelle a slight nudge and she made a low grumbling noise before exhaling softly.

“You have a point, El,” She said quietly, smiling greatly, her eyes full of admiration.

We began walking forward; we couldn’t take even a few steps without being swarmed by another gang of undead. I couldn’t take my eyes off Nick, struggling ahead of me and I felt guilty and scared, I needed Nick. I looked over at Rochelle quickly and she looked straight ahead, emotionless and I suddenly reminded myself of her crying earlier.

“Uh, Ro?” I mumbled, quietly and played with my gun in my hands, brushing my hand gently along it, avoiding eye contact with her. She made a sharp grunt, letting me know she was listening.

“Uh, why was yew cryin’?” I asked her, looking over slowly and she frowned, still not looking, she exhaled softly again. She sighed often.

“Ellis,” She stopped and I obediently stopped with her. She turned and faced me, clopping around with her boots and put her small, delicate hand on my shoulder, her face suggested that she could cry again anytime but at that moment when I saw her bottle up her tears I realized. _That’s just like what I do_ , I thought in shock, _God damn Rochelle, I never knew you did it too and I thought I was weak._ She opened her mouth but shut it and turned the corners up, faking a smile.

“Well El, earlier we had walked past my old news van and-” She coughed and held the pause before shaking her head as if checking it was on alright, “And I saw two of the people I worked with, the camera man, Joel, and my good friend, Taylor.”

She stopped and I frowned, tilting my head, sadly. She shook her head again but sympathetically at me and ran her hand over my cheek.

“Taylor had shot herself and Joel was, well, undead,” She coughed, fighting back tears, “I had to kill Joel.”

I gasped, quietly, bringing my hands to my mouth, covering it. She sobbed but pulled herself together quickly, fixing the underneath of her eyes that was smeared with dark running makeup. I put my arm around her shoulders and tried to comfort her.

“Ro, ah’m sorry ya had ter do that,” I said in a low tone. She wiped away her tears and rekindled the smile of her face, soft and small, just enough to make you feel safe. She looked away and I took my arm off her when we began walking again.

Slowly and quietly, looking straight ahead and expressionless she said to me, “I’m sorry I blamed you, I was angry, I know you wouldn’t have wasted that health pack.”

I nodded, making a reassuring grunt and she continued, “Nick cares about you, a lot, he was the one defending you after all and I’m sorry that Coach and I have been unfair,” She took a calm breath and readjusted her ak-47, checking the bullet supply.

“I want you to help Nick, if anyone needs you most, it’s him.”

I looked ahead and he was leaning against a game stall, breathlessly, his eyes were shut tight and Coach shot away anything threatening his health.

“Go on, go.” Rochelle patted my back and I began slipping the health pack off my back and slung the shotgun over my shoulder, sprinting towards Nick and Coach. Coach looked at me, his eyes blank but his mouth frowning and then he swapped his attention to Rochelle taking her time to reach us. I stopped beside Nick and he was groaning in pain. He flinched when I began to check his serious injuries, opening his eyes wide, pulling away from me slightly.

“I only want to help,” I said, trying to comfort him and he snorted, “I don’t need it.”

Coach growled, shaking his head and looked over at Nick. He was a mess, his coat was a state, there were stains of blood stretched across his stomach and chest area, his pants were muddy and shabby and his face was covered in blood. Nick tended to refuse help, he liked his independence but right now, even Rochelle encouraged me onward to help him. Nick really needed this.

He eventually stopped defending himself and accepted the help, bad-temperedly, swearing under his breath. He looked directly at me, frowning angrily when Coach had been talking to Rochelle as they impatiently had to wait around for us. He blinked and began preparing his rifle for the next horde.

“God-dammit Overalls, you’re the only reason I’m still alive.”


	11. Killing me.

Across the deserted, trashed park grounds we spotted a barn house.

“Oh man, maybe they’ve, like, horses fer pettin’ or ridin’ ‘n’ stuff,” I mumbled to myself, grinning in hope. I think Nick heard because he slipped me an offensive look like the ones before and I looked away, taken aback. _Why’s he mad? I helped his behind_ , I thought, disorientated.

Rochelle tapped my back and I spun around to face her, she was smiling. Her dark face was paler than usual but her crimson lips were still stretched ear from ear, her hoops were still there, the ones that Nick wanted her to take out but she refused saying her look wouldn’t be complete without them. Her eyes had bags under them again, they had worn away when she had awoken earlier but now they were chasing back to her. Her t-shirt was soaked in her blood, starting from her shoulders and upper back trailing down to her tailbone. I looked at her shocked and she kept smiling, hiding her pain.

“Oh no,” I said, staring at her, she was a mess and I felt as if I should have helped her instead, Nick would soldier through flames and acid with nothing but adrenaline and emerge a champ. Rochelle grabbed my hands, when I had tried to help her by wiping blood from her and pushed them towards me, closely to my stomach and gripped them together, loosely.

“Ah, Rochelle, ah’m sorry, ah shoulda-,” She shushed me and kept her weak smile upon her sickly face.

“No, Ellis, you did the right thing, I’ll be fine,” She tried to reassure me before nodding back to Nick defending the end again, “He needed it more than me and you’ll benefit too.”

She let go of my hands, gave me a friendly head bob and stumbled to Coach’s side. I maintained the middle again. _Gosh darn_ , I thought, slumping and dragging my feet, carrying the burden of being unnecessary again. I began to tangle around trying to pull my baseball bat from over my shoulder into my hands and we finally reached the barn.

A few zombies stood, clueless, inside, swaying in one spot. I lazily hit one to the floor and mashed it in the head, ruthlessly. Nick always told me to give no shits about the dead, they were dead so it doesn’t matter who they are now, they could look exactly the same as your mama or partner but it doesn’t concern them who you are, that’s probably why he gave no sympathy towards Rochelle today. Its head splattered open once it reached contact with my bat and fleshy pieces sprayed around onto piles of hay.

I looked around, trying to be discreet, hoping to see a well horse but the only animals in the room where the dead cows hidden in small areas fenced off. Coach and Rochelle passed through to the next room with more pens and I continued my search for the horses.

The disgusting smell of decomposing flesh was trapped in the room so Coach opened the outward facing doors into the next room but they began scavenging for loot before moving through. I got it through my head there would be no horses so I leaned back onto a pen fence and waited, disappointed. I watched Coach brutally kick down a zombie and stomp its head, I frowned and looked away, repulsed and slightly terrified. I stared down at the blotchy dead carcass on a pile of hay, I couldn’t even look at that so I turned my head upward and sat on the edge of the fence, looking at the ceiling, dully.

“Let’s keep moving,” Coach declared when he straightened up and kicked through the small gate again. I shifted my weight back onto my feet and balanced myself off the fence, looking ahead. We all walked through the doorway in our usual arrangement and the room exposed a table of bullets straight away and I swung my shotgun over my shoulder, nudging it and grasped it tight, hurrying to the supply. I grabbed a handful and began slotting them in as the others joined the table, it took me a while considering I was completely out and I finally finished a little after they did. On the other tables were some other resources but not many and Nick, Rochelle and Coach had collected their share, leaving me adrenaline and a bile bomb. I picked up the jar and it sloshed loudly, swirling around a green clumpy substance and I stashed it before I felt anymore sick along with the adrenaline. We all took a break, breathing in and out carefully, allowing us time with our own thoughts. Rochelle was standing, bent over slightly, staring at the far barn wall with one hand to her head, Coach was leaning against the wall, beside the door, he was watching us and waiting for his signal and Nick sat back on one of the tables, leaning on it, observing his ring as he spun it around his finger. I cleared my throat.

 _Ah man, if Keith was here I wouldn’t be so darn bored_ , I thought as I lifted myself up and onto a table, _we would be doing cool stuff like the ol’ days, not this_.

I looked down at the fully loaded shotgun in my lap and ran my finger along the markings, frowning. _Man Keith wouldn’t shoot these things,_ I shook my head, looking down my pants at the blood and muck stained trimmings, _he’d avoid them and build a-a… A big ass monster truck and we’d scoot all the way to Los Vegas._ Nick looked over as I inspected the blood all over my clothing, frowning and he frowned also, his dark eyebrows furrowed together and his thin lips turned downwards.

“Remember, they’re not alive anymore, they’re not who they were so it doesn’t matter,” He announced and Rochelle exhaled loudly, joining Coach who was nodding and preaching Nick. I kicked my feet, swinging them off the side and Nick stared at me, longer, waiting for some kind of response but I didn’t give him any and kept looking down, ignoring him. I began to bite my lip and thump my boots together when I heard Nick sigh quietly to himself. Everyone was taking in this worth-while break nobody noticed Nick shuffle over to me.

“Ellis, a quick word,” He demanded, nudging me off the table and through to the other part of the barn that we had already searched. He flicked his head at Coach and Rochelle and Coach returned the nod. Nick kept pushing me past the dead, feral cows and into the beginning of the barn house and let go. I stood there, oblivious, as he shut the door and edged a bale of hay and a crate against it, his messy, bloody jacket kept flicking in front of his hands and he impatiently flipped it back behind his hips, neatly. I stared at his large, veiny hands as they swung gently by his side, they both clenched together once Nick realized and I switched my attention back to his face, it was scowling.

“Wha’ do yer want, Nick?” I mumbled, preparing myself for some kind of insult or something offensive. I raised my shoulders and looked at him side on, his red nose was scrunched up and his eyebrows were screwed together. I took a few steps back onto the wall and leaned against it, his eyes were squinted and dangerous looking, just like his mouth, tight and frowning. His pale face was inches from my own flushing red face as I tried to back myself away, only to slide up the wall in terror, he took his hand and swept loose bits of dark hair back colliding with the rest and merging into the wearing gel. He finally spoke.

“Listen here, kid,” He hissed at me, he put his hands against the wall each side of me to prevent my escape, “To me, you are the only thing that matters, okay?” He still had an offensive look stuck on his face as he kept growling at me.

“I couldn’t give two shits about Coach and Rochelle, they have each other,” He began to look sad and he paused but didn’t drop his stance, he stayed rooted to the spot, he gave his head a shake and tried to speak firmer like before, “But I have you so you’re my burden to carry and I will carry you to the fucking edge of the world if I have to,” He managed to get his angry voice and scowl back. I gulped and blinked my big eyes at him and he stared into them as if reading them.

“Those monsters out there are the fucking reason I could lose you and I do not want you to think they’re real people, like Coach or you or any of us, are you listening?” He growled and I nodded shaking all over, “You’ve got to toughen up and beat the shit out of anything threatening your life like a fucking dead, mobile, brainless corpse with no emotions or feelings would,” He paused again and looked down at my boots, edged together nervously, “But- but not too tough because I need you to need me.”

I tilted my head onto my left shoulder trying to look at his face, I was smaller than him so I could easily look at him, his eyes were dead again and his mouth frowned loosely. Suddenly, his eyelashes flickered upwards and his grey eyes shot at me and he scowled again before making a quick movement, too quick for me to register to and he collared me, slightly knocking my cap up and revealing more of my face. I began to panic and he began breathing heavily, growling and I gave a small yelp for release but he kept me almost dangling, held up to his face only by his two hands clenching my shirt.

“You don’t even fucking know, Ellis!” He hissed at me and I tried to pull his hands away, “When those things are killing you, they’re killing me too!” He heaved me against the wall, heavily, thumping my back into the wooden structure, hard, “You kill me all the time, fucking stop it!” He finally gave a final heave of me into the wall and once he let go and I tumbled down the wall and tried to catch my breath. I crouched on my feet, trying to get up. I looked up at Nick staring down at me, his eyes small slits and his mouth completely straight, pieces of his black, slicked back hair had freed themselves again but he ignored them. He began to fix his own collar and jacket and I limped, pushing up on the wall, before he hooked his arms through one and under the other, lifting me onto my feet. He looked at me again, slightly embarrassed.

“I apologize; just stop getting hurting, I’m sick of seeing people hurt, eh?” He grabbed my trembling hand and pulled it close to his jacket, I smiled and nodded.

“Ye’ it’s awright, Nick,” I replied, lively. _He finally said sorry, well kinda,_ I thought while staring at this man, who was nervously and guiltily looking down at me. He squeezed my hand at my response before nodding through to the other door and letting go as we approached Coach and Rochelle.

Coach finished whispering something that made Rochelle laugh loudly, resounding her laugh around the barn when we got to them and he looked over shocked.

“Uh, you two ready then?” He muttered, shooting a look at Rochelle that silenced her quickly, choking down laughter. Nick stared murderously at the two and asked them what the joke was.

“Oh, joke, um…” Rochelle said, pushing one hand behind her hand, “It wasn’t cool.”

I butted in, excitedly, “All them jokes are cool, ah lurve jokes, can ah hear’t, please?” I rattled, clutching my hands together, pleadingly. Rochelle shook her head and Coach did also.

“No, not like that, it wasn’t cool as in it wasn’t nice,” She mumbled, telling me like she had to tell me my puppy died.

“Oh,” I frowned, looking over at Nick and he stayed silent, still glaring menacingly. Coach began to fluster and in panic, he pushed open the door.

At our doorstep sat something that terrified us all. A cry echoed through the barn house as we all tried our best to stay silent. I reached out for Nicks hand but he moved it away and I knew I had to be tough.

“Shit,” Nick hissed, under his breath and added, “Bitch.”


	12. Fighting for family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I'm getting so slack with this, I've got exams at the moment and my car was recently crashed into and ugh. Well enjoy anyway, thank you for your patience, you're all lovely if you're up to here!

Coach staggered backwards in shock, stomping his shoes a little too loudly.

A sobbing skinny, grey woman kneeled in front of us. Her face was buried in her bloody, hands tracing off long, slender fingers pointed at the end like claws. Her grey hair dangled, messily and limply along her face and spilled off the sides off her hands, concealing her distressed expression. She limply helped herself up, slightly bending but she still had her face in her hands.

“Oh, is she-” I began to whisper but Nick hushed me violently and grabbed the back off my shirt, pulling me back and I stumbled backwards, quietly. She began to walk towards us when Rochelle jumped backwards and ran a short distance away from the woman wandering blindly who was approaching her. She kept trailing behind Rochelle who had to continuously rapidly move for spot to spot, she gawked at the woman who was in nothing but a nude small tank top and matching underwear, torn and coated in dirt and blood and quickly looked over to Nick for instructions, he was good at handling this kind of thing. Nick twirled his finger in a circle and mouthed the word loop to her as he used one hand to push my back forward, impatiently pressuring me out the door and Coach jogged out quickly.

We stood by the door, wary, waiting for Rochelle who was trying to be as quiet as possible while she paced hurriedly around the tables, wagering with the woman behind her around. Her dark brown eyes were wide and her hands were shaking as she clutched her ak-47 to her chest. Nick waved her to hurry and she gave a lurch forward when she heard the crying closely following her tramping loudly along. The woman began to pull her horrific hands down, revealing a pale, wrinkled face with glaring orange eyes that stared right at me and her mouth gaped open, showing her sharp, dirty teeth. I gasped and backed up, Rochelle lost her nerve and jumped the rest of the table, sprinting through and knocking the other two out of her way. She ran past us and we all got the message to run as the woman began to give a loud shriek. Coach took off after her, hot on her heels and Nick turned to them to run after them. She stretched her arms wide and began stumbling about, speedily, towards me. I stared, in a trace and my heart raced fast as her loud pitched scream became the only thing that I heard, I couldn’t even hear the yells of my name or anything else but I could feel a tug on my arm, yanking me hard but I only staggered sideways to straighten up and I continue staring, dropping my gun letting it hang by my side. Her body was crooked still but she began to run, directly at me, her tears rushing along her cheeks. I blinked and felt a rush of tears about to tumble out of my eyes when the woman stared at me, running towards me with her arms and hands in attack position. Once she was moments from me I flinched and pushed my arms out to push her away but I stumbled backwards with my eyes shut and a loud roar crashed through the screams and a cloud of smoke lingered around, the smell of gasoline hung around with it. When I opened my eyes again a bloody mess lay in front of me and Nick stood bent slightly with a chainsaw in his hands, exhaling and inhaling deeply and he wiped his forehead with the back of one hand. He looked at me, daggering me with his grey lifeless eyes, he looked mad again. I blinked, shook my head slightly and opened my mouth to say something but he spoke over me.

“Stop it,” He said, bluntly and I ran my hand over my cheek, nervously, remembering our conversation. I looked over to Coach and Rochelle in the distance, Ro had just uncovered her face and stared at me with a hurt expression. Nick threw down the chainsaw with a loud thump, scraping along the concrete before clutching my bicep tight and pulling me with him. He gave a shocked look down at the ground and looked back at my arm and stared at the muscle; he looked away and shook his head slightly. I gave the same look at my other bicep, flexing it slightly and screwing my nose up. _Yeah they’re big_ , I thought, but _I’m the biggest idiot._

Coach and Rochelle began climbing up onto some massive, construction cinder blocks, helping one another up as we waited for them to heave up onto a roof and carry on. Nick let me go first as I lifted myself, tucking one knee on the block and Nick pushed me up slightly and I managed to stabilize myself by leaning on the next stacked block. I leant down and offered him my hand but he gave a cough and pulled himself up, struggling.

“I don’t need help,” He finally told me, taking a deep breath. We both got up the next block and onto the roof easily. I’m glad Rochelle and Coach stopped distancing Nick and I, it was much nicer having the freedom of talking to him and messing around with him and I did really miss his comfort. He shot a side glance at me, making sure I was stable on the roof and he stopped tensing his shoulders, rolling them back slightly, shifting his jacket. I looked at him and slowed my pace of the tiles of the roof.

“Uh, Nick, can ah say some’in’?” I asked him, he continued to walk in front of me at a faster speed than me but mumbled something.

“About back thur,” I began, taking my hat off my head and pushing my hair back before adjusting my cap again. I kept trying to allow my breathing to continue being easy but it was hard with all this running around, killing and trying to talk to Nick who made me nervous. He stopped very suddenly, almost sliding down the tiles as I perched on the rim of the roof.

“What?” He said, bluntly.

“Ah’m sorry ‘bout that, s’just she was lookin’ like this time-”

Nick interrupted me, “If it’s about that asshole Keith, forget it.”

I shook my head and shoved my hands in my overalls pockets, glancing over the rooftops, watching Coach and Rochelle not too far away.

“She looked like this time ma maw was upset af’r her ‘n’ paw had a fight an’ all ah wanted to do was comfort ma maw but ah couldn’t cause she don’t come back after that an’ if ah could re-do that moment ah would hug her and make sure she don’t leave cause, Nick, ah really do miss her a-and… and ah-ah-” I stopped talking, trying to prevent any tears and Nick edged around slightly, getting a good look at me. His bottom lip trembled when he opened his mouth to say something but quickly his thin lips sew together and turned into a spiteful frown and his dark, slim eyebrows furrowed.

“Who cares about family, they’re good for nothing,” He grumbled, still standing on tiles carefully as best as he could in his dress shoes. I sniffed and shook my head, holding onto the bill of my cap between my finger and thumb.

“Ah care,” I mumbled, biting at my lip.

“You shouldn’t!” He growled, he held up a fist and extended his sharp index finger upwards.

“Your mother left you and abandoned you over some stupid conflict because she can’t face her own problems and would rather run,” As he said this, my jaw begun to shake and my hands had gone cold.

He extended another finger, “Your father was a good-for-nothing free loading, abusive, unappealing, brainless slob, and he was a gambler and an alcoholic and was nothing more than the dirt I walk upon.”

And finally he pulled up a third finger and added, “And your only true connection to someone was a hillbilly with no more brains than the fucking dead outside, got you almost killed multiple times and has had the worst impact on you mostly because you never shut up about him and to me, you’re everything that this idiotic, worthless scum was.”

I began to shake all over and the cold raced up the rest of my body, raising the hairs on my arms and dotted goose bumps along them also. My bottom lip quivered and my eyes began to blur due to tears. I couldn’t deny anything Nick said because partially it was true in some sort of context and partially I was too choked up to say anything, I shoved my hands fiercely into my pockets and cleared my throat, blinking intensely to rid of tears. Nick’s face softened and he quickly scanned my face.

“We can’t be thinking about stuff like that, ok, we have bigger things going on right now.”

I nodded but looked away from him, staring to the left, visually making a trail along the rooftop. I waited for his movement to follow but he stayed still, watching me but I continued to avoid eye contact.

“You want to know something, Ellis?”

I made a small grunt in response and my stomach began being fluttered about with nervous butterflies.

“My family was worse, I shouldn’t have said the things I did but I don’t like thinking about family,” He said, flatly and I looked up at him, he exhaled with my eyes focused on the tiles.

“Oh, what’s wrong with yer family?” I mumbled so quietly I barely heard myself.

Nick shot a blank glare at me before gazing upwards at the sky being eloped into the grey, thick clouds, there was no pink sunset at all.

“I’ll tell you another time, ok?” He said, looking back over one of his shoulders. I bit my lip again when he looked and he exhaled, softly.

“I will, we’ll have to know most everything about each other for future plans.”

Nick suddenly slid down the side of the roof, purposely, startling me jittering the tiling. _Oh my, does he mean what I think he means_ , I blinked at him and pulled my hand out of my pocket and pushed it on my hot, flushed cheeks, in attempt to cool them down.

“Let’s go, it’s getting dark,” He said, emotionless, leaping to the next roof like some kind of ninja and I followed him, obediently.

We eventually got down the last ladder that Coach and Rochelle stood around, chatting impatiently waiting for us. There were scattered dead bodies around and they had already taken care of the minor threats, they both looked mad.

“Took your time,” Coach muttered to Nick as I climbed down the steel ladder.

“Shut up, Ellis was crying,” Nick hissed, looting around straight away. I jumped quickly off the rest of the ladder and my face turned bright red, Coach shot a look of uncertainty over at me and relaxed when he saw my expression. I began to rub hard at my face, embarrassed and accused and Rochelle looked over at me sympathetically and gave an aw noise.  I looked over at Nick angrily, but he was too busy searching around to notice my expression so I sighed loudly instead.

I would’ve said something mean to him for making that up but it saved a lot of hassle between Rochelle and Coach so I tried my best to go along with it and then I would talk to Nick.

“Why were you crying, Ellis?” Coach asked, he stared at me and I stiffened, standing straight and opened my mouth to protest, I felt humiliated but before I could say a single word Nick answered.

“His family,” He hissed, fiercely, looking over at Coach with such aggression in his eyes that Coach flinched at the look. I took a small step back towards the ladder behind me and Coach stopped asking questions, avoiding eye contact with the both of us. Nick quickly scanned along Rochelle before glaring at me so viciously I got goose bumps and I hurried away, trying to distract myself by searching around. I hid behind the other side of the buildings, pulling past things, my stomach had been bombarded with butterflies and I felt as if finding something useful would settle it.

Rochelle eventually called my name and I arose out of a pile of uselessness in distress, my dirty hair was ruffled at the front, messier than usual and my eyes were widen, blue gleaming greatly. She gave a tut when she saw me approach her covered in hay, pieces tumbling off my hat and onto my shoulders, and she swept at me with her hand, delicately, as best as she could. I gave a slight cough and wiped at my face with the back of my hand.

“What’s the matter, sweetie?” She asked me, quietly, as I stood a few feet away from her, my boots turned inward slightly, a habit I had grown into that occurred whenever I was nervous, I tapped them together uneasily. I shrugged at her casually, staring dead on into her eyes, a trick I had learnt from Nick. She shifted as uneasy as I was, resulted in my stare.

“Why were you crying over your family?” She whispered, stepping closer to me, changing her tone to soothing and she patted my upper arm, trying to comfort me. I kept my glance steady trying to be as fierce as a small young pup could be.

“What’s wrong with your family?” She persisted, nosily.

“It don’t matter,” I muttered, glancing away momentarily and quickly reattaching my glance to Rochelle who looked too curious.

“Talking about it helps,” She stated, losing her cool.

“Ah don’t wanna talk bout it,” I mumbled, folding my arms and frowning, taking a short step back.

“Ellis-”

A loud bang of a box being thrown about shocked us both and loud footsteps paced nearby.

“He doesn’t want to talk about it, back off!” A loud voice boomed causing my heart to jump, dropping my stance and I tried steadying myself. Rochelle looked over my shoulder petrified and I spun around.

His coat was dangling half off one of his shoulders and he was covered in muck, with blood splattered along various areas of his hopeless, wrecked suit. His dark, slick hair was barely held in place and his eyebrows were furrowed, angled towards each other, furiously. His cheekbones traced crimson along his face and his thin lips were pressed tightly together, scowling. We both stumbled backwards as if we had witnessed a tank, pummeling towards us at top speed. Nick was extremely fearsome at times.

He stomped towards us, steaming and I gave a quiet squeak. Rochelle tried to regain her threatening stance but her fear of Nick was overpowering, I always felt bad for her that they never got along and that she happened to be the one to retreat in those situations. Even I wasn’t afraid of Nick as much as Rochelle was, she tried to be scary like him, almost as if she looked up to his strengths but he looked down on her, like he was doing now.

He towered over her, stepping inside her personal space, intimidating her greatly. She didn’t flinch at all but stood, strong, with her thin arms, tucking beneath each other. He gave a small grunt and she continued to look up at him, his teeth clenched and she blinked, slowly, pretending to be unfazed. I stepped back for the situation and looked around desperately for Coach.

“Don’t pressure him about stuff like that,” He hissed, through clenched teeth.

“I was trying to help,” She said, in a low voice back.

“No you weren’t,” Nick muttered, bluntly.

Rochelle tightened her arms folded and exhaled, angrily, “How come,” She began, screwing her nose up and raising one eyebrow, “you only care about Ellis now?” She hissed.

Nick began to speak with a low growl when she cut into his sentence, like he had done before, “You couldn’t have given two less shits about him a week or so ago and now you’re like…” She extended one arm out and waved it at him then me, “You’re like over-protective of him?”

“You can’t be at my throat because you think he can’t handle his own situations!” She growled at him, “For Christ’s sake, I used to be the one to have to baby him before you and now you’re acting like it’s always been your job!”

 Coach emerged from around a corner and once he caught sight off the two squaring off he gave an irritated sigh. I stared at him until he eventually saw me hidden away behind the ladder and hurried over to me; he didn’t say anything but he stood by my side, keeping me out of it even though it was all about me.

“Shut up!” Nick growled at Rochelle but she wouldn’t.

“You could’ve left him behind easily any day but now you’re trying to be mister nice guy-” She kept hissing at him, cutting him off every time he tried to interrupt.

I looked over at Coach, who was standing beside me defending me from anything; he was squished up rather close to me. I began to tap my boots together, nervously and tried to distract myself from the two arguing. Coach slipped a side glance at me, trying to be discreet but I could feel his eyes on me. Once he looked away, I glared at Rochelle who was gesturing with one hand frantically and Nick trying to interfere.

“Ah’m more trouble than ah’m worth, ain’t ah?” I mumbled to Coach and he gave a small grunt, not disagreeing or agreeing but letting me know he took my words into consideration. I sighed.

A loud groan came from behind the building followed by more footsteps, louder and many more than Nicks and suddenly a chorus of groans and shrieks echoed into the open air. Nick and Rochelle dropped their guards and turned, quickly fumbling for their guns once they saw a horde of undead sprinting full speed towards our position. Coach had quickly begun to open fire and I tugged at my shotgun strap before changing my mind and bringing out my bat. I stepped out from the ladder, crouching slightly, waiting for them to get close enough before I make my move, something Coach had told me to do earlier in this entire course of events. I watched few bodies drop, life lesser than before and slimy, gunky blood splatter along the concrete and the rest staggered towards us at great speeds, I had my baseball bat clenched tight in my hands, waiting.

I began growing impatiently as every chance I’d get it would be penetrated with a bullet to the head. I began crawling slowly forward, crouched and prepared, trying to get my share of pride in protecting the team. Suddenly bullets rapidly flew over my head and left my head bare but my surroundings safe when I watched my hat soar from my head and the bullet responsible pierced into a zombie’s head, thrusting it backwards onto the pavements as dead as it was the first time. My trucker hat tumbled amongst the gaining horde and I gasped, lurching forward instinctively.

I scrambled for my hat, while being knocked about and the sound of close gun fire deafened me and a high pitched, piercing noise overtook any other noise. Rotten hands desperately grabbed at me but I scrambled urgently forward, only thinking in the moment and a heavy weight pinned down on me, disallowing my movement but I still reached forward for my hat, being kicked about. I wheezed while the weight pressured on my back and plunged me back onto the ground, throwing me about as I squirmed ridiculously and I eventually touched my hat with the tips of my fingers, knocking it further away. I couldn’t hear or breathe but I knew, just like every other time, I was an idiot. Suddenly it dropped me and I thumped to the ground in a heap, squinting my eyes trying to look around for my hat but everything was blurry and all of a sudden two feet stood in front of me, turning my vision into nothing but two bright orange columns upon polished, black base. I gave a gasp, breathlessly before attempting to look up. The loud ringing noise was fading and instead a lot of loud voices pierced my ears.

I was coughing up a bloody taste in my mouth and lying, immobile on the floor with my head spinning, _Y’all doubted me,_ I thought and a dark, messy hand with an orange sleeve rolled up slightly along the arm shot down in front of me, trying to heave me up.


	13. Patrick.

“How is this possible?”

We had moved and were boarded up in the barn house again and I was sitting down, legs stretched out in front of me, leaning on the wooden structured wall. Rochelle was by my side allowing me to lean my head, which had been pounding with a headache, on her shoulder. Nick crouched by my other side, holding my hat safely until my head was better. He was frowning at me, playing around with the hat in both hands.

“Was it really worth it?” He asked in all seriousness, raising one thin eyebrow upwards. I chuckled, softly, before screwing my face up due to the throbbing pain intensifying in my head.

“Yep,” I replied, smiling.

Nick gave a soft chuckle and shook his head. He straightened up, still with the hat in his hands and rolled his shoulders back. Rochelle draped her small, delicate hand across my head, carefully.

“So let me get this straight,” A familiar deep voice stated from the other room, it was Coach and he was standing in the doorway, not alone.

“You happened to be holed up around here to hopefully get rescued by some type of search party, you have no group and you’ve managed to survive this long without food or water?” Coach noted.

I looked at a dark, thin man approach Coach from the other side of the barn, in a jumpsuit like my own except I had tied the arms around my waist for easier upper body movement and his jumpsuit was orange with black patterns in certain areas, it was painted up and down with blood and guts, staining it just like Nick’s suit. He had a scruffy slight beard and little hair upon his head but he looked friendly. He had a large cut along his cheek that had healed so it was nothing more than a large, deep scar, his lips were plump and smirking, his eyebrows arched smartly, he looked as if he could be Rochelle’s brother. His back pocket of his tattered jumpsuit held a small dagger, I remember being helped up fuzzily and he retrieved that dagger from the back of the oddly proportioned, rotten special infected, wiping it down on his outfit and slipping into his back pocket.

“Not to mention his lack of fire arms and where he happened to come from,” Nick mentioned, strolling over to the door, with my hat tucked under his arm, where tables stacked in front of it we had stacked as a barrier. 

The man adjusted on his orange, messy sleeves and rolled it back up his arm. He smirked, opening his mouth slightly to reveal his shining white teeth, and gave a shake of his head and folded his arms, almost as slick as Nick does.

“Nah man,” He said, smoothly, leaning against the doorframe, “You’ve got it wrong, I’ve been here with my buddy, I told him to stay inside when I heard that chaos, yo.”

He looked over at me and gave a small wave and I returned it, weakly raising my hand back.

“Well what about everything else?” Coach asked, as curious as the rest of us.

He gave a shrug and asked what he wanted to know first and Coach answered with “Why do you just happen to be here?”

“Oh, we’ll we have been holed up a bit, I guess, but…” He leaned forward, making sure we all heard but nothing outside of the barn did, “I got a fancy kind of radio that only happens to work here and I’ve been trying frequencies and I heard a voice on the radio station nearby so I went out quickly, found my friend I’m with now, I knew him, isn’t that just my luck?” He laughed but gave a gesture with his hand, flailing it.

“But then we had been there a while and we heard some police or something asking over the radio and we replied then they said they’d be here soon but that was long ago and now we’re just waiting around with the radio, it’s been easy living though.”

Coach and Nick stared at him, doubtful, but he raised his eyebrows and gave them a nod but I just stared at him in awe.

“What about food, water, weapons?” Nick asked, quickly.

“It’s not that hard to find food when the only things that eat, apart from you or I, don’t like the same food,” He gave a snigger at his joke and so did Coach but Nick stayed emotionless, “But water’s a mission but we’re stocked up on bottles and we’ve been trying to find a clean supply, like y’know, a river or something?”

Nick held my hat in his hands and played around with it, doubtfully.

“Oh and weapons,” He leaned back against the doorframe, “Well we don’t really have guns, like you guys, but I’ve got a pocket knife.”

Coach and Nick both had expressions of disbelief on their faces.

“Just a pocket knife,” Coach choked, suspiciously and the man nodded.

Coach began to say before Nick cut in, “What’s your name again, pal?” He asked, catty.

“Patrick,” He answered, smartly.

I didn’t think the name Patrick suited him.

There was a long silence and nobody asked anymore questions, though we all wanted to.

“How about we go get my buddy if the little kiddo’s feeling better?” Patrick offered, nodding towards me. I grinned and slowly got to my feet to show him I was feeling better, I wasn’t really but I wanted them to think I wasn’t fazed easily. He smiled back and made a move towards the door, where Nick was standing.

“Here, El,” Nick said, passing me my hat when I approached him. I caught it quick and put it on my head, longing it.

“El, that’s your name?” Patrick asked as we waited for Coach and Rochelle to ready to prepare.

I shrugged, slightly embarrassed at my nickname, it sounded girly so I didn’t really like it, except when Nick said it, he made it sound cute. “It’s Ellis,” I told him, friendly and he grinned at me.

“Okay, Ellis!” He said.

“That’s Nick, he’s really cool,” I pointed at Nick who had a venomous look on his face, Patrick smiled at him too.

“Nice to meet you, Nick,” He said, cooly and Nick nodded, slick, and said quickly “You too, Patrick.”

“I’m Rochelle!” She introduced, bouncing over to us, flirtatiously. Coach rolled his eyes.

“And I’m Coach,” He said, flatly. Patrick waved at the two, “Nice to meet you guys also.”

Coach returned the politeness with a head bob and Rochelle gave a bashful giggle.

“Well are we going to go or not?” Nick added, moodily.

We all began pulling away the tables and hay bales from the door and Rochelle heaved it open carefully. She gave a clear check and we all began retracing our steps from earlier, there was a trail of blood leading back to the barn and I shuddered, it was my blood. The sounds of our footsteps made varied, echoing sounds. Patrick waved us onward to where he had been staying as we wander past a narrow alley we had missed down the way. Patrick turned sideways and edged between the brick walls, coated in blood. It was an extremely tight squeezed and Patrick wavered us on, looking back often, Nick went in after him, then me, Rochelle and Coach was last, he was panting and having trouble but we refused to leave him behind.

“How do we know we can trust you?” Nick muttered to him, wheezing slightly. Nick wasn’t claustrophobic; I knew that, he just didn’t like tugging on his suit like this.

“Well I saved your little buddy,” He chuckled, stepping slowly, “Plus you guys have guns, no way am I messing with that.”

Nick made a noise of agreement and eventually Patrick squeezed into an open space. He waited for us, grinning politely as we filed out of the thin walkway. I looked around and it was a large abandoned car park leading into an isolated area of apartments, all blocked off by a wired fence. The buildings reminded me of the hotel we had been in a long time ago but these were a smaller block and differently structured.

“Did you make this place yourself?” Coach puffed, exhausted and relieved.

 Patrick shook his head, “Nah, found it, handy place it was.”                    

“Was?” Nick questioned.

“Well I’m coming with you guys now, right?” Patrick said, giving a small shrug. He looked at me and I stared back in a daze.

“Now, we never said anything-” Nick began before Rochelle stomped him off his sentence with a loud of course, darting Nick with furious eyes. Nick snarled back at her and clenched his fists.

“Luke!” Patrick called out suddenly facing the buildings at a small, orange suited man leaned out off of the balconies and he gave a big wave down at us. He turned and left the balcony, disappearing inside.

Patrick smiled softly at us and gestured up to the building, “That’s my buddy, Luke.”

“Delightful,” Nick muttered under his breath and he folded his arms, grumpily. He took a deep breath and gave a big, false grin, “So how do you to know each other?” He asked, cheerily.

“We lived together,” He replied, hesitantly.

“Oh, where did you guys live?” Nick continued to be a dick. Patrick frowned at him and raised one eyebrow.

“I know what you’re getting at, Nick, and yes we did happen to come from prison because I killed a man and god help me I’ll do it again.”

Patrick laughed, shrugging his own words off and Nick’s face turned to shock. Silence lingered and we all stayed quiet, all unsure whether or not taking a murderer on board was a good idea.

Nick looked back at me and took a step closer; he saw the look of confusion and innocence on my face. I whimpered as I watched Patrick take a malicious glare at Nick before turning away and smiling softly at Rochelle, who smiled weakly back _. Oh gosh_ , I thought.


	14. Luke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a tumblr!   
> http://prettypinkgamer.tumblr.com/  
> I use it for l4d, l4d2 and other fandom stuff. I update on the story there and post my art there! :~)

He was short; Patrick was towered over him slightly without any attempt to. He had bushy, dark eyebrows that were close together and it made him look angry continuously. His jumpsuit was identical to Patrick’s, patterned orange and in disgusting condition. He had short shaggy hair and he frowned, wrinkles creasing mesmerizingly on his forehead. He had just stumbled out into the car park and joined our circled group.

“Luke, this is Ellis, Coach, Rochelle and Nick,” He lingered sourly on Nick’s name, hinting to his friend. He gave a wave, holding a small pistol in the other hand. I waved back and so did Rochelle, Coach looked suspiciously at the two men facing us and edged closer to Nick, who was standing arms folded and stared impatiently.

“Hi, I’m Luke,” He said to us, his voice croaky and high.

“I was just telling my buddies here how we met,” Patrick said and gave a mighty laugh that I almost flinched at. Luke nodded at us.

Luke stepped away and signaled Patrick over and they began to whisper between the two of them and we all grouped together about 100m away.

“I don’t trust them,” Nick said, straight away, hatred rolling off his tongue.

“No girls!” Rochelle muttered.

“We need supplies,” Coach told us, “They said they have some.”

I stayed quiet and I took a step back to breath. They huddled in closer and closed my gap; I screwed up my nose at them and decided I would go talk to Patrick and Luke instead. I walked over quietly.

“Here’s the plan,” Luke muttered, quietly. I put my hand over my hand and stood still.

 _I’m no snooper_ , I thought but it was always helpful to know what they were going to do. I pulled my head away trying to keep my good karma but my instincts pulled me closer and I leaned in, silently.

“We get them to take us to their supplies, ask for guns…” Luke whispered, I gasped trying to stay mute.

“Shot ‘em in the back!” Patrick muttered, excitedly.

Luke nodded, “Exactly, take everything and get gone.”

I gasped again and retreated fast, making a loud skit with my boot accidentally. They turned around fast and looked extremely defensive; I had quickly positioned myself next to the group casually leaning slightly in. Patrick and Luke watched me fiercely as I tried to avoid eye contact and pretend I didn’t notice them. Rochelle glanced at me, confused.

“What on earth…” She mumbled, looking at me before looking away and breaking the group. She kept staring at me, wary. I tried to say something to Nick but he shrugged me away.

“Well where are we going?” Luke asked.

“We thought y’all had supplies here? Don’t you want to bring them?” Coach suggested, desperate for supplies as we were running low.

Patrick shrugged, “Nah.”

“Nah,” Coach screwed up his face, “You’re going to need them.”

“Nope, we’ll use yours,” Patrick grinned maniacally and folded his arms as Luke looked at him.

I heard Nick groan something quietly and run his hand through his hair, desperately. Coach looked around, glaring at us for back up, we really need supplies and Patrick being stubborn wasn’t going to help. But Nick was the last person I wanted to get involved. I stepped past him towards Patrick and Luke, my heart beating rapidly. My hat loosened and I pulled it on tighter.

“Ah’ll get ‘em fer ya,” I said with a quaver in my voice, I knew their plan and I tried desperately for the others to notice too. Nick was right. I stepped away from them fast, speed walking to the buildings.

“I’ll go with him then,” Luke said.

Following that, footsteps paced fast behind me and I glanced over my shoulder to see the short man racing towards me with his pistol held tightly in his hand. I began to pull my shotgun off my back, nervously, just in case. The building entrance stood a few feet away before Luke pushed down on my shotgun that I had been tugging at.

“You won’t need it, there’s no zombies in here,” He told me, my hands began to sweat and I let go gently of my gun. He looked at me with such foulness in his dark brown eyes, half shut by his eyebrows furrowing together.

We both stepped inside and he pointed to some stairs, directing me to follow him and I did obediently. I watched him peer around the corner, wary before stepping out bravely and trailing down the corridor. There were doors shut and jammed to our right and there were big cuts out of the side of the balconies that we could see the others talking and Nick looked spiteful even from up here.

“Hey!” I yelled down, smiling, waving frantically. They all looked up and gave a wave back while Luke shushed me and looked ever so tempted to push me off the side. I glared at him, concerned.

“I thought you said there was nothing in here,” I stated in a quiet voice and he gritted his teeth and rolled his eyes.

“There is nothing in here but you keep yelling like that there will be,” He growled and I looked away fast, feeling embarrassed.

I pulled myself together and followed him further up the buildings to what seemed like the top floor. He signaled me to wait and I patiently waited at the top of the stairs like he told me to do and he proceeded along the familiar corridors full of inaccessible rooms until he came to stop at a certain room. He began to bang on the door and I flinched at the first loud noise and spun around, cautious of anything that would hear the noise. It flew open eventually and he grinned, proudly and menacingly, before turning to me and waving me over. I ran over like a sketchy cat and stopped very suddenly, it was a small room with two rolled out sleeping bags each with a pillow and in bad condition, a few boxes and a small jewelry box sitting past the sleeping area.

“Grab the box quickly I think I hear something,” He said, holding up his pistol facing the way we were headed.

I ran across the room and kicked past the boxes and leant down at the sleeping bags, reaching out for the small, velvet locked box. I touched the small padlock, delicately.

“Do you have a key?” I asked. He didn’t respond. I jingled the padlock, louder.

“Does this thing need a key?” I asked, a little louder. I could hear his footsteps walking slowly so I turned around.

He had shut the door quietly and left it partially open, holding his pistol through the crack.

“What’s out there?” I whispered, pulling the box close to my chest.

He finally turned around and shut the door fully, it cut off quite a lot of light but the room was still slightly lit because of the small celled off window behind us. He frowned, almost apologetically before coming closer to me. He knelt down to me and looked me directly in the eyes.

“Aw man,” He began, whispering gently.

“What?” I muttered, looking at him, worried. He put his hand on my shoulder and put all his weight on me, pushing me back slightly. He looked down and shook his head; his wrinkles on his forehead became too visible again. I leaned down to look at his face and all of a sudden he pushed me hard, knocking me onto my back and he hurriedly put all his weight on me, pinning me down. I panicked and began to reach for my gun with my free arm but Luke slammed his hand down, heavily, on my arm, trapping it. He shakily pulled up his other hand with the pistol in it and held it in front of my face.

“Patrick was just starting to like you,” He said, frowning, he twisted the gun about and my heart began thumping rapidly. I was sure he could feel it.

“Not me though, I hate you kid,” He told me and laughed, the room cut off a lot of noise so it reflected off the walls in here and the end of each sentence lingered. He grinned, psychotically, suddenly and my eyes widen. He edged the pistol closer to my forehead.

“Poor little Ellis,” He began saying with a small rhythm in his gravelly voice.

“Nobody in the world could care for him; they could do without him and be just fine,” He sung, “Just a little fuck up who believes he’s happy in this world, his parents were the worst part and he doesn’t even miss them-”

“Stop!” I yelled at him, desperate and struggling. He suddenly pushed the barrel of the pistol onto my forehead, pushing the bill of my hat back slightly.

“Shut,” He took a deep breath, “The fuck up.”

I began breathing unsteadily. He spoke spitefully at me, trying to mess with my head before he blew my brains out but I was too focused on figuring out how to get out of this, I was a strong guy and I’m not dependent.

 _Okay Ellis, you can do this_ , I thought, looking past the small but mighty man sitting on me, _just think._

I thought for so long that the sound of Luke cocking his pistol awoke me from my daydream.

“Your turn to talk,” He said, mumbling so close to my face. I widen my eyes and looked at him, panicked.

“Say something!” He pressured the gun down onto my forehead harder so hard a ring, red imprint could be left.

“Uh,” I stuttered and he jerked me suddenly, throwing my back down hard on my weapons.

“Ah!” I spluttered before hurriedly beginning, “There was this one time, ma buddy Keith ‘n’ ah was playin’ with this grenade lookin’ thing, ‘course it wasn’t a grenade but me ‘n’ Keith was so sure it was at the time we played hot potato an’ when he dropped it, we both dived away and ended up lookin’ like idiots,” I spoke shakily. Luke gave a small chuckle but looked down at me, frowning again, looking unimpressed.

“Keep going,” He threatened.

“Hm, Keith and I once got in a faight, yah, there was these massif faights in our neighbah hood and one time this faight broke out on his property so we jumped on in an’ boy, it was a heck o’ fun but Keith broke his nose,” I said, losing enthusiasm. He cracked a smirk across his emotionless face but raised an eyebrow, encouraging me to continue.

“This one time Keith had lost ‘is mama, we didn’t ever know how,” I took a deep breath, this story had been on my mind a lot but it was the first time I had ever told anyone about it, “But this time Keith asked ta be ‘lone so being his best bud ah let ‘im be, ah mean ‘is mama meant a lot tah me as well, she was kind of ma replacement mama af’er mine left so it was hard on me too.”

I paused and Luke frowned at me, sympathetically for a moment before scowling and ordering me to carry on. I took a deep breath and kept going.

“Well ah was callin’ him one day and he don’t answa so ah left a message and a while later ah call him up tah remind him we had tah go tah the garage the day but it went strai’tah voice message and ah was getting’ worried so ah got a few things, put ‘em in my truck and went round the block to Keith’s,” I began to forget completely about the pistol about to blow my brains out, “When ah got there his truck was on, wastin’ gas and the song called ‘I don’t want to set the world on fire’ or somethin’ was playin’, it was his mama’s favourite so ah turn it off, take the keys and went inside.”

I felt the pistols pressure on my head loosen and Luke had pulled it up slowly, staring into my eyes, sadly.

“He was sittin’ there on a stool, tears rollin’ down his cheeks with his pa’s pistol in ‘is hands, cryin’ over it and ah rush up to him, askin’ him what’s wrong an’ stuff ‘cause he’s the happiest guy in the world and seein’ him cry was the worst thin’ ah had ever seen an’ ah seen alotta bad things lately, but this guy meant so much to me and at this moment, ah thought he was gonna shoot himself so ah took the pistol, he put up a fight for it but ah got it and he cried tellin’ me what was the point so ah look him in the eyes and tell him ‘Keith, pal, you is the best guy in the world, you is the change on this world that is supposed to happen and if you go, you wouldn’t be ending yer misery, you would be causin’ mine, your pa’s and all our buddies, Keith I wouldn’t be me without you.’ Then he smiles at me and it was the saddest smile ah’d ever seen but to this day, he’s the happiest guy you’ll ever know, like it never happened.”

I stopped and closed my eyes, breathing in and out.

“Where’s Keith now?” Luke mumbled and I shrugged.

The flow of sadness overtook and the weight on my body lifted. I opened my eyes to find Luke standing, the pistol by his side and he had one hand outstretched, offering to help me up. I looked at him in disbelief but took his hand; he heaved me up onto my boots and stood, shakily in front of me.

“I’m sorry,” He muttered, his eyes were glassy and he was frowning, close to tears.

“I’ll tell you something, Ellis,” He began, “I knew you heard our plan, I’m scared for you facing Patrick but you earned my trust, pal.”

He held out his hand to shake and I took it, gently, suspicious but he shook hard and smiled, a tear glittered against the light shining from the window and rolled off his eyelash, trailing down his face.

“I’m not happy with the life I’ve chosen, I wish I could just join your group, you’re all so happy.”

“You can!” I insisted.

“No man, I’m not happy and you’re a great guy and I don’t want to hurt you,” He told me, sentimental. “Your group really needs you and they look out for you heaps especially the doctor guy, in fact they’re probably worried right now.”

I frowned, “Why don’t you just be happy?” I shrugged.

“It don’t work like that, kid,” He gave a weak chuckle, “Give Patrick that box, okay?”

I looked down at the box, sitting where my death bed could have been and stared back at him in shock.

“No, yer not gonna do this to me too?” I cried, softly, watching him play around with the pistol in one hand.

“I’m useless, Ellis, you’re such a great guy, you’re going to go far but I’m sorry you have to see this,” He sobbed, smiling softly at me.

He moved his pistol quickly to the side of his head and I gave a yelp, desperate for him to stop. His finger twitched on the trigger and the next moments blew my eardrums and a fleshy pink mess fired out from the right side of his head and he fell lifelessly, dropping the pistol and producing his own red pool. I put my hands over my mouth and sobbed, staring at him. I was shaking all over and my temperature fell extremely cold. I looked down at the pistol before switching my eyes to the jewelry box and hurriedly picking both things up in a heap and huddled it close to my chest. My eyes began stinging with tears and all I wanted to do was to be comforted by Nick. I stared down at Luke a little longer and my heart beat sped up when I heard loud footsteps hurry my direction. Patrick burst through the door with a manic expression on his face; he looked like he was ready for action before his face dropped at the sight of his buddy on the floor and my sobbing. He grew furious and ran to Luke, crouched down and put his arm over his lifeless body. Patrick’s face was hidden but when he revealed it again it was paler than usual and his eyes had dark circles under them.

“You killed him, you motherfucker!” He yelled at me. He got onto his feet, pulling out his knife and held it up defensively. I stumbled backwards and began to stutter.

“No, no…” I sobbed, loudly, retreating from Patrick; he stood extremely still and held the knife ready. I shakily pulled the jewelry box away from my chest and held it out at arm’s length.

“He said to give this to you,” I mumbled, blinking hard.

He snatched it from my hands and checked it, the lock was still intact and he gave a short glance down at his friend.

“So he just killed himself then?” He growled, sarcastically but I nodded and his face began to take on a shocked expression. He looked at me then back to Luke before switching between us, emotion changing fast. He frowned at me.

“No, he wouldn’t,” He hissed, tearing up and I pulled my hand up to my mouth and began to bite on my index finger as I nodded again, pathetically. He jabbed the pocket knife forward and I flinched, falling backwards onto the wall and he pulled it back to himself and switched it down.

He stared down at Luke, sniffling.

“Why?”


	15. No joking matter.

Once the others ran into the room, silence fell upon us all. Rochelle’s light gasp was the only thing I had heard for a while. I wanted to say something but all I could do was watch Patrick break down before me, curled up with his head burrowed between his arms. The darkness had lingered through the open door and barred window and the only light, moonlight, had lit up Patrick’s hunched back and along the side of Luke’s lifeless body. Nobody wanted to switch on  their torchlight either but when I looked up Nick gave a wide yawn, rubbed his eyes and glared momentarily over at Rochelle, who had her hands to mouth.

Patrick’s sniffling slowly came to an end and his sobs quietly faded.

“C-can we at least bury him?” A murmur escaped from the folds of Patrick’s dark arms and echoed quietly in the room.

“Sure we can, boy,” Coach answered, supportively.

We all watched Patrick scramble onto his feet, holding the small velvet box closely to his chest. He had his small pocket knife in his back pocket again and he looked down sadly at his friend.

“C’mon, it’s okay, Patrick,” Rochelle began to put her arm over him before he hooked his arm over her shoulder quickly and she slipped her arm around his waist. He began shuffling away with her towards the door and she gave a quick glance at us, a clear instruction for us to be careful with Luke’s body.

I stood on the farthest side of the room right under the window, projecting the moonlight, still holding the pistol shakily in two hands and stared down at Luke. I hadn’t realized that Coach and Nick had been staring at me for so long, I finally looked up at them and they both stared in shock at me. I wanted to tell them but when I opened my mouth the only thing that came out was a whimper and my bottom lip began to quiver.

“Oh, hell no,” Coach quickly stated, widening his eyes and I shook my head in response.

“Please tell me he was at least infected,” Nick commented and I shook my head again, he gave a loud groan and pushed his hand through his hair.

“What happened, Ellis?” They began to pressure and I took a quick sharp breath and tried to say something but nothing came out.

They both looked at each before Coach glanced down at Luke and pulled a disgusting face at the bullet wound penetrating Luke’s left side of his head and the blood pouring along the floor, pooling around him. There was blood splotched all over my gear that had burst horrifically from his head. I whimpered and my knees collapsed under my weight, shaking nervously. I tumbled harshly onto the ground, giving a small groan and lay next to Luke, I looked at him and a shiver ran down my spine as I stared into the slightly graying eyes of the dead man. His mouth was frowning; painted red on the inner lips and the colour from his chubby face was escaping from the hole in his head, leaving his face as white as a sheet.

I hurriedly collected myself together and scrambled to my feet, checking myself for dirt or blood, which was pointless because I was covered in it. A grasp tightened on my bicep and I flinched, instinctively jerking my arm behind me, throwing the pistol a while away.

Nick’s familiar sigh sounded beside me and he came into sight. He shook a bit and told me to calm down and help before he kicks my ass. I took a deep breath and tried to steady myself, clenching my fists together. I stared back down at Luke as a weak sensation ran through my body again but I shook it off.

“Alright, Nick, I couldn’t find any stretcher-like things,” Coach announced when he re-entered the room, he looked down at the body in disgust again but determined. He left the room again and his loud clumping footsteps followed the same trail that Rochelle and Patrick went.

“Just quickly, he won’t turn, right?” Nick questioned, anxiously, taking a step away and I looked up at his thin, pale face. He brought his hand up to his face and ran his fingers along his stubble, mesmerizingly, and drew his thin lips together into a frown, furrowing his eyebrows, not taking his eyes off Luke. His hair that had been gelled back was wearing off extremely and a thin piece of hair hung over a large scratch along his worried wrinkled forehead.

“Are you going to answer me?” He asked me without even giving a glance in my direction.

My stomach stirred, _I thought it wasn’t supposed to be answered_ , I thought. I opened my mouth to say the same but it didn’t convert any thoughts to words. I let out a long breath and relaxed my shoulders but kept my eyes on Nick.

He continued to look down at the lifeless body, his light blue eyes held home to the irreplaceable mysterious stare. His nose gave a twitch just like a rabbit’s nose and I exhaled quickly through my nose, amused by Nick. He dropped one bruised hand into his suit pocket and with the other hand, fixed his collar. He began rubbing, self-consciously, at the lipstick mark without even looking at the mark; he was so familiar with its placing. He dragged his thumb over it hopelessly before pushing his dark, shiny hair back.

“Why are looking at me?” Nick suddenly hissed and I quickly turned away to look at the concrete wall instead.

There was a long silence before he took a small sigh.

“I didn’t say you couldn’t,” He muttered but I still didn’t return to looking at him.

Coach’s loud footsteps paced back towards us and I held my breath, slowly looking over towards the open door. A large buff, black man wearing a worn out purple and yellow t-shirt stood in the doorway, shadowed by the darkness, was holding a large plate of metal in two hands. He stared curiously at us before dropping the metal loudly and suddenly.

“Whoa, Coach, do you want us killed?” Nick growled in a low tone, holding his hands out in front of him as if to steady Coach. The dark man just stared us down dangerously and jerked his shoulders.

“Hurry up, Nick, get his feet and Ellis, support the upper body.”

I looked over at Coach and he waited impatiently, tapping his large, messy trainer loudly. I stared down at the dead body and shivered; I bent down and slipped one hand under his head, making a disgusted face. I jerked his head the other way so he wouldn’t be looking at me with lifeless eyes. His body started to give off a deadly scent that made Nick gag and complain but Coach shrugged it off.

Nick grasped around the orange pant legs and held steady for a while, waiting for me. I took a deep breath and tried to be brave and ignore the gruesomeness like Nick but I couldn’t, the bullet wound bled out onto my hand and began to breathe fast. I tried to not look at it but I couldn’t help but notice that it had really shot through the top of his jaw, cracking the entire jaw and making it loose. I put both hands under his head and lifted, shaking intensely.

“C’mon, that Patrick creep is probably messing up Rochelle,” Nick said, deliberately putting that thought into my head to make my hurry. I slipped my hands further under and lifted Luke up by under his arms and Nick lifted too.

We shuffled backwards slightly before there was a growl and Nick and I both jumped, nearly dropping Luke. Coach laughed and patted his bulging stomach.

“It must be feeding time I guess,” He joked but Nick stared unimpressed at him.

“Sorry, just trying to lighten you guys up.”

Nick suddenly spun back around from Luke and began to have a go at Coach.

“How come you’re not doing anything? Don’t try to make jokes when you’re not the one in this situation, you’re not doing anything, whoa don’t strain yourself man, maybe you should make sure there’s no pebbles in the way? C’mon Coach, there’s so much you’re doing, take a break, maybe a cup of tea would help?” Nick kept going.

My arms began shaking terribly and I felt as if I was going to give way. Coach ignored Nick.

“Here, come sit down on this lovely modern furniture, isn’t the weather wonderful? Wow, I’m glad only real pandemics happen in other countries, not our safe ‘MURICA.”

He began to mock my accent, Nick really was losing it but I just focused on keeping Luke up.

“Well darn heck, I can’t believe this guy is dead, like in the movies, like when me and my buddy GOT FUCKING TRAPPED IN A FUCKING PANDEMIC WITH A FUCKING BUNCH OF ASSHOLES WHO THINK CRACKING JOKES WHEN THIS GUY COULD POSSIBLY BE UNDEAD AND EAT US IS A DARN GOOD TIME TO, Y’KNOW, HAVE A FUCKING LAUGH, LET’S FUCKING LAUGH AT ELLIS’ MURDER.” Nick suddenly stopped, breathless and avoided eye contact with both of us and stared down at Luke instead. I tried to tell him it wasn’t me but nothing came out so I gave a loud sob instead and went back to silence.

“Maybe,” Coach began, “You should check?”

Nick fumed.

“Check what?”

“Y’know, if he is undead or not?”

Nick inhaled and exhaled, trying to calm himself as I stood shaking.

“Why fucking not?” He answered and we all waited in silence for a while.

Nick gave a small gasp and his whole face turned pale, well paler than usual.

“Let go!” He yelled at me, desperately and he dropped Luke’s lower half but I kept hold, thinking he was being sarcastic like his earlier act. I made an attempt to talk before there was a large movement in my arms, I tried letting go but something had held on.


	16. Oh, my God.

“Ellis!”

A scramble of violence struggled in my arms and I fell backwards, trying to catch myself but missing and thumping painfully on my spine. A greying man clamped onto me, groaning fiercely in my face, I looped my arms through his and held tight on his neck. A loud yell escaped from my lips that had refused to unmute earlier and I was screaming for help. I was holding back against an undead monster as best as I could, my hands get shakier as the grey face pushed closer to mine. He looked so alive, Luke, the only difference that was significance was his odd colour of his face and body. I jerked my arms fast and my steadiness had been lost once I saw that its loose jaw detached in a bloody mess, dropping on my face, leaving me spluttering, spitting the taste of decomposing flesh and blood from my mouth. It gave a loud, jawless shriek and to my rescue, a large red axe hacked into its head, spraying gooey flesh everywhere and I kicked off the dead body in a hurry.

Coach heaved me up fast before moving me behind him, keeping me out of any more danger.

“Boy, we could of lost you there,” Coach mumbled, holding his grip on me tight.

Nick slipped me a worried glance and grunted.

“It wasn’t your fault though,” Coach added, “I have to say, you handled it better than usual.”

I pulled a disheartened face and he let go, Nick didn’t say anything but I remembered what he said what seemed like a week ago, _When they’re killing you, it’s killing me;_ I thought about it and sighed.

“Reminded me of that hunter situation-” Coach stopped himself and Nick shot a dangerous look, the whole situation came back to me and I shuddered. The silence in the room overcame us all and suddenly Nick jerked down and heaved Luke, fiercely onto the metal.

“Rochelle said be careful,” Coach stated.

“It’s a little too late for that, isn’t it?” Nick commented, gesturing over to me then to the rotten, detached jaw.

I felt guilty and shuffled a small distance out the door.

“Nick, you get that side and I’ve got this side,” Coach ordered and bent down to clamp onto the metal, heaving him up too fast.

“Shit!” Nick yelled.

He hadn’t grabbed hold fast enough and the lifeless body slid towards him and tumbled out onto his dress shoes, blood stained them and far up his white trouser leg fast and Coach put down the metal again, sighing.

“Fuck!” He spat again, “FUCK, SHIT, BITCH, DICK, MOTHERFUCKER, CU-,”

Coach spun around and put his hands over my ears and nothing except a muffled sound of anger spilling out of Nick’s mouth slipped past Coach’s hands. When he let me go Nick was bright red and trying to breathe calmly. He slowly pulled himself together before unleashing a largely motioned kick and hit the body, knocking it back far towards Coach.

I watched in disbelief as Coach shrugged it off and picked up the metal, that Nick actually had hold of. They began to back out of the room so I moved from the doorway, out into the corridor. They trailed down and I was following them quietly mourning Luke as we went.

When we reached the bottom, Patrick and Rochelle were sitting at the bottom of the stairs and got up quickly to let us by, they both looked sorrowful but we continued to fulfill our instructions and we lay Luke down on a patch of grass. He looked far from peaceful and I wanted to believe he was in a better place but I couldn’t and I sat down as the others stood, quietly. Rochelle nudged me with her bony knee but I ignored her and faced the lost life.

“What are you doing?” She hissed, bending down to my ear.

Patrick opened his eyes and stared at us, despising and Rochelle quickly apologized before nudging me harder. I didn’t respond. The moon shone on us harshly and yawns flood amongst us as we stayed grieving until eventually Patrick brought up the idea of sleeping in a room in the building. We all agreed and moved up.

“I’ll stay up,” Nick insisted though the bags on his face were dark and his eyes were almost as lifeless as Luke’s.

We had taken the sleeping bags from the small room that Luke spirit may forever remain in and lay them in a lower floor room, the window was barred and the door was large solid one. I was sitting cross legged on the plaid, cushiony sleeping bag of Patrick’s because he believed he should use Luke’s.

“Hell no,” Coach said quickly to Nick, who stood against the doorway.

“Then who will, huh?” Nick said.

“Patrick shouldn’t have to stay awake for people who seemly killed his best friend,” Patrick stayed completely emotionless but exhaled quietly from his nose.

“Ellis is a crybaby and Rochelle’s injured from that big jockey ride that happened a while ago,” I screwed up my nose and Rochelle’s face went pale as the whole situation flooded back through her.

“And Coach, oh Coach, you do too much, my friend,” Nick finally said, Coach felt slightly grateful and didn’t seem to protest, nobody wanted to protest because Nick could argue his way through court and convince the jury himself to pled guilty.

Finally sleeping arrangements had been sorted out. The whole room was silent and Nick sat outside the room with the door open, the room was slightly crowded. I shared the sleeping bag with Rochelle, Patrick used the bloody sleeping bag and Coach slept sitting upright against the wall. I left my hat and boots by my head.

I stared up at the dark ceiling for what seemed like too long as snores slowly destroyed any peacefulness that had attempted to soak into our stressed minds and bodies. Rochelle slept against me, closely and I could feel the rising and lowering of her breathing against her back and I looked across to out the door and the outline of Nick was illuminated brightly, he was sitting, looking off the balcony at something across the way. I squirmed out of the sleeping bag and Rochelle rolled over instinctively, sleeping peacefully.

I crawled forward to Nick’s outline and when I was a few feet away I could hear a small sniffle. I stayed extremely still and listened harder, Nick was quietly sobbing trying to muffle out the noises and I felt shocked, Nick doesn’t cry.

I touched his back slowly and he held his breath quickly and flicked me away, elbowing me hard and forcing me to be thrown a distance. I clutched my flawed ribs, which had been damaged far too many times, and tried to catch my breath, helplessly. Nick quickly threw himself on me, holding his arm to my neck and his rifle in his other hand, I choked up trying to speak and I must’ve sounded like a zombie because he was so close to blowing my head off. He stared down at me fiercely, no sign of any hope in his grey dull eyes, did he know it was me, he held still for so long waiting me for to move but I stayed where I was. His face was lit up by the moonlight and his grey, stubbly cheeks were wet and the tips of his eyelashes were dewy and sparkly. He let go, I was still unsure whether or not if he knew it was me but he turned away. I sat up, holding my side trying to breathe once again. He shut the door to the room which the others were in and my heart beat sped up.

“They’re all dead,” He said in a hushed tone, facing the edge of the balcony again, sitting down, huddled. I still had no clue if he knew it was me but he seemed like he was waiting for my response.  I tried to say something to comfort him but nothing came out.

“Everyone I cared for,” He turned to face me; he must have known it was me.

He jerked forward and collared me, which was so familiar with him, pulling me close.

“I didn’t care for many people,” He hissed, “I felt nothing mainly and I cared for little people.”

He took a deep breath and shuffled closer to me on his knees.

“And they’re gone, what is so wrong with this world?” He began to get louder, “Where is god?”

His face became inches within my own, the light lit up against my face and his hands loosened but he didn’t let me go.

“You’ve lost people too and you’re a good kid, so why should this happen to good people?” He said, slowly becoming quieter.

“So many things have offered us eternal sleep and one of these days we’re going to fall asleep and we won’t wake up.”

His voice shook and I suddenly realized why he wouldn’t sleep, he was afraid he wasn’t going to wake up and his care for me was why he tries to watch over while I sleep and the comfort he brings to while I sleep or during my wake. He feared death even though day after day he stared it in the face with such confidence, his lack of support for other deaths is a disguise and he’s constantly wearing it.

“The difference is,” The words began to slip out my mouth and knit neatly together, “They is dead en yew is alive, so you live.”

He let me go gently and I curled up close to him, burying my hands in my jumpsuit. My mute had broken but I still chose to stay quiet. His eyebrows were arched and his face was pale, blue and black. He looked at me in disbelief and silence lingered for a while until suddenly he leaned forward and planted a kiss placing his thin lips on my own, that bloomed into warmth and comfort, and I returned the kiss, crawling into his lap. He moved away first and pulled his arms around me, his jacket gently folding over my arms that slipped under and touched his back softly.  He began to say something but not to me.

“Lord, your idea of less is more is taking those who mean most and if we work for what were owed then how come many die owning nothing but the worth of their ashes and, dear lord, equality is biblical to you, is it not? But you see Father, I cannot believe in you if you do not believe in me.”

I could feel the enthusiasm as Nick said it, the rising and lowering of his chest and the vibration of his words linger through his backs into my fingertips. Nick had shown a whole different side of himself to me. I buried my hatless head into his chest and finally heard familiar words that soothingly brought comfort.

“I hate quotes; I will never say another in a lifetime.”


	17. The first encounter of Nick.

Nick had gently planted a kiss on the end of my dirty, button nose as I let my fingertips drag along his boney back. We were wasting the night away, I knew it but Nick wouldn’t let me return back inside, he kept his grip on me. I watched him drift in and out of consciousness and he kept denying anything about being tired.

“You can trust me tuh proteck ya, Nick,” I’d tell him quietly, over and over.

His familiar grumble would reply with “I’m not tired,” He tried to deny it but the longer he stayed awake, the worse he got at lying.

I looked over the balcony into the pink horizon and took a deep breath.

“Can I tell you something, Ellis?” Nick muttered.

I grunted.

“I didn’t want to panic anyone, please promise you won’t panic,” When these words slipped out of his thin, purple lips I held my breath.

 _Please, Oh god no,_ I thought. My ribs were surely bruised because my heart was thumping viscously and I think he felt the fast pace of my heartbeat because he hesitated more and spoke a lot slower. He watched my worried expression on my face.

“No, I’m not… Bitten,” He shuddered as he if were thinking about something I had no idea of.

“Don’t worry about that,” He finally said, letting me calm down.

He looked over to the cloudy sky and had a dead expression.

“I saw them.”

There was a long silence.

“Sore wut?”

He cleared his throat.

“There’s a horde coming, they’re moving and I think they’re becoming smart enough to figure us out.”

I scoffed, “Nuh Nick!”

He nodded but I refused to believe him, I had to believe him though, he was right about things like this all the time.

I suddenly saw the fear in his pale, scruffy face, if he was scared, how were we supposed to make it.

I pushed off of him and staggered onto my feet.

“Nick! We haf tuh go!” I said, in distress.

He snatched my arm quickly and pulled me down, I jerked down with the movement of it. Nick’s face grew mad again like always, it brought slight comfort being confronted with such a familiar expression, it reminded me of the first time we meet.

 

I had woken up from a terrible sleep in the garage with a look of amazement.

“Ah’m a zombie now, aw man, ah’m awesome!” I yelped excitedly, staring down at my messy arm although my colour was still pink and fleshy.

 I scurried around and opened the door to the flat and let myself out.

“Now, furst thing tuh do as a zombie,” I said, beginning to note things out loud to myself.                           

I looked around, few zombies stood with their heads against posts and hung onto fences, depressingly. The sky was a soft yellow coated in grey billowy clouds. I began to walk out confidentially, striding widely before thinking about being a zombie again and starting to play the part, drooping my shoulders and making inappropriate noises. I hadn’t been paying much attention but I had headed into town, it was only a small way away from the blocks Keith and I stayed in. I couldn’t help but get a little more nervous when I see the fumbling dead people observe me for a while and I started to gain speed, limping falsely away. One made a loud grunt ahead of me and I looked up and saw a rotten arm stretch out, as if trying to contact its fellow zombie. I gave a yelp and jerked away. I stood very still while a lot of heads turned in a struggle, I tried to play it off but it was too late, I was off barely touching the ground, pushing through the walkers in my path fiercely in panic. Many were hot on my heels.

“Help, enywun!” I yelled, stupidly in desperation. My voice was nervous and there was a crack midsentence.

I kept running down the main street, closed in by collapsed buildings and some abandoned standing ones. My breathing was fast and I began to get a sharp pain in my ribs. I dodged into a building and dove under a flight of stairs, watching the zombies sprint past the doorway, clueless. I grabbed hold of my ribs that had bruised on the side in a flowering pattern, growing across my chest painfully. I stretched the other arm out to search for some tool of self-defense and my hand eventually found a small metal pistol, grasping it tight, desperate. I pushed into the darkest corner of the cubby and held one hand up shakily with the other arm wrapped around my chest in pain. A small groan echoed through the area and I took a sharp breath before holding it in. I held the gun up. The taste of blood dribbled through my mouth and down my chin but I chose not to worry about it yet. The approaching groans were growing louder and more concerning until eventually a wobbly figure blocked out all light sources, leaving its front side shadowy. It slowly leaned towards me until I saw its grey flesh, decomposing along its body as it reached towards me. I help the gun steadier now, I had used a gun before, I could do this. I pulled the trigger and an empty, terrifying noise was produced. I clicked again and repeated the noise.

“No, no, no, no, SHEIT, NO, NO!” I began to wriggle around looking for a bullet, stretching out to the other corner until there was a sharp jerk on my arm and the undead creature had a hold of my wrist, trying to jerk at me. I pulled away desperately and gave a jerk like a puppy in tug-o-war. I tried to slip sneaky glances around but my vision had seen nothing useful. I held the gun tight in my hand and in a last second thought, used the grip to smash at the beasts head. I was hitting it brutally, sobbing with every hit. It was slowly losing its strength. A loud thrash and a splatter of its skull made me cower. I had killed it, there was blood along my arms and hands and I felt terrible. I squirmed back into my corner and curled up, staring at the headless corpse. I sobbed, thinking about the familiar shirt, it looked like an old friend of mine.

“Do you hear that?” A distant voice muttered in the distance.

A woman’s voice followed, “That crying?”

 _Well shit,_ I thought, _I am going fucking nuts._

I put my hands on the sides of my head and the voices faded out for a while.

There was suddenly no light and I sat extremely still, trying to muffle out my own sobs. A figures outline grew and there was a suited man, I felt hopeful until there was a barrel pointed directly at me. It was hesitant before suddenly dropping fast, along with the figure. It crouched down and crawled towards me slowly, wary. His large hand outstretched in front of me and I gently placed my own hand in it. I was desperate for help, I needed somebody. His hand grasped on and softly pulled me onto my feet with my empty pistol in my other shaky hand. He turned and the soft light shone onto his face, he had grey stubble that looked rather scrubby around his jaw, his thin, white lips were downturned and his thin grey eyes were looking at me, softly but fiercely. His face was pale and his hair was dark and slicked back, he had blood and cuts all over his boney face, he looked so angry but I was too grateful towards him to notice.

That was Nick.

And right now, he’s giving me the same look as he did when he rescued me from under the staircase.

“You said you wouldn’t panic, Ellis,” He hissed.


	18. Sacrifice.

I widened my emerald eyes and Nick stared into them, scowling, and I felt as if he could see the young me, when I was young with my small, denim dungarees and red booties. I quickly backed off and stumbled away from him.

“W-what do we do, Nick?” I murmured past my hands, clasping my face in distress.

He didn’t say anything but a glimpse of light shone on his pale cheek and the white ray stretched across his frowning mouth.

“Nick?”

He slowly stretched over to his belongings and fished his dress shoes out from the unorganized pile. He slipped them onto his feet as I watched, crouching on my knees and made no noise. He removed his jacket from my lap and slid it over his shoulders.

“There’s not much we can do,” blandly, replied Nick, “Maybe we’ll survive a few waves.”

I stared at his mouth, shocked that he would even say such a thing. He didn’t look at me at all but I knew it was because he didn’t want me to see the sorrow burying itself in Nick’s inner shell, his eyes as the only windows to view the monster inside. My throat begun to burn and my stomach twisted and turned viciously.

“No!” I hissed at him, suddenly gaining a fierce attitude and the confidence to exert it.

“Nick, this isn’t you, you should have said something,” I paused, making large hand gestures, “Something mean, saying they can go to hell!”

He looked at me, blank.

“Shit, Nick, wake up!” I begun to get louder, “I don’t know who you are anymore but I don’t like it, I don’t remember meeting this guy and I sure as hell don’t remember falling in love with him!”

Nick leaned forward quickly and swung me, quickly, into a headlock. I had begun to squirm, too angry to figure out his words that he started spouting out of his mouth. I bit his hand, hard and he gave me a harsh whack to the back of my head, knocking sense into me and I fell limp in his grip, hurt.

“Listen here, Ellis, shut up and let me speak,” And I complied, allowing him to go on, “Firstly shut your goddamn mouth, you don’t love me, nobody could love me, why do you think I’m divorced?”

I couldn’t see his face due to the circumstances but I froze; only my heart beat thumping rapidly.

“Secondly, I am me, you don’t know me at all, everything you thought about me was wrong, I’m bitter and won’t hesitate to hurt people I love.”

I felt like pushing him off me and giving him a nasty blow to the skull with my bat because I was sure he was dead to me.

“Lastly and most importantly, don’t follow me,” He said this in a more subtle tone, one that didn’t pierce a wooden stake through my chest.

He quickly hit me hard enough with the barrel of his gun that I fell unconscious.

When I did regain conscious, I had been surrounded by a circle of curious and worried survivors.

“What the hell?” Coach immediately commented and I slowly got up, leaning on the palm of my hand.

“Where’s Nick?” Rochelle questioned, trying to help me onto my feet and I began to recap Nick’s harsh speech.

I quickly got up and rushed into the room, grabbing my boots and hat. I fixed my hat onto my head and started to slip one foot into one of my dirty, clunky boots as I hopped around. Rochelle watched me make a fool of myself and sympathetically shook her head, which caused me to slow down and properly lace up my boots.

“Ellis, do you know where Nick is?” Rochelle questioned me as I picked up my weaponry and set them over my shoulder.

I looked at Rochelle and reached out for her, “Look, this will sound crazy but he left us, he stranded us to die and he doesn’t care about us so who cares about him!”

Rochelle, Coach and Patrick all looked completely taken aback.

“But you were gay as hell for him,” Patrick snidely commented.

I gasped, dramatically, “I am not queer and sure as hell not for him.”

Patrick rolled his eyes but everyone ignored it, seeing as he was only a new addition. Rochelle sniffed, near tears and grasped Coach, pulling herself close to his chest.

“I guessed it would have been him,” Coach muttered, patting Rochelle’s back.

“We need to find him then?” Patrick exclaimed, in a suggestive tone.

I immediately scoffed, holding back secretive anger that I had stowed built from earlier.

“No, we don’t, we let him leave and don’t follow him!”

Rochelle rushed over to me, gripped my shoulders and gave a shake.

“You can’t leave Nick out there, we need him, Ellis!” She yelled at me and Coach tried to pry her from me as she dug her nails deeper into my skin, through dirty fabric.

“Let’s go!” Patrick insisted, making a walking motion, swinging his arms by his sides and striding in one spot.

I stared at him, scowling just like Nick would.

“Boyfriend mission,” He continued, waving me over.

I stayed firm in my spot as Rochelle tried to pull me, heaving with all her might only to make me stagger slightly.

“C’mon, boy,” Coach growled, scooping me up over his shoulder, “Let’s go before zombie’s get ‘im and by the way, hitting me ain’t workin’.”

I kept hitting him anyway as I got swayed up and down over his buff shoulder. I could see Patrick’s smug expression as he trailed behind us through the empty carpark. When we reached the squeeze walkway Coach put me down but kept a firm hand on my wrist, leading me through with a struggle as Patrick kept Luke’s pistol against my lower spine.

“Patrick, you don’t have to do that,” I muttered but he jabbed it, harder, and I sped up.

Once we reached the open, Rochelle stopped us all, holding a hand out cautiously.

“There’s nothing there?” Patrick said, peering over the rows of shoulders.

Rochelle turned to Patrick and whispered, “Exactly.”

We all stayed still for a bit as nothing happened.

Coach heaved me up, expectantly, again and pushed past Rochelle, impatiently. Ro sighed but obidently followed and Patrick slid his pistol away safely, walking beside Rochelle.

We went on a long walk through open passages, which had been closed earlier, and stayed clear of all undead. There weren’t many, just a few holding on fences depressingly or the odd few on roofs. Over Coach’s shoulder I had begun to drowsily think about Nick, recapping certain parts of our friendship.

No, it wasn’t just a friendship; I did feel a romantic connection with the crude, vile and manipulative older man. I had really deeply felt like I could go no longer or survive anymore without Nick around, he was my rock, even though he was bitter and cruel I admired it. Nick had this stupid ability to pull me so close until I could feel his heartbeat on my fingertips and then push me away and completely forget about all our connections. I was so jealous, I wish I had the self-control but Nick made me weak in the knees and I can’t go on any further without him. I couldn’t believe I yelled at him earlier, I didn’t care about what he did to me, I should have gone after him straight away and I should have figured out why he was putting on his shoes and coat.

“Ellis, I’m havin’ to put you down, don’t you go anywhere,” Coach suddenly informed me, cautiously.

I felt myself getting closer to the ground until the tips of my toes were in contact.

“We gotta go though, Coach, Nick needs us!” I said, eagerly.

Patrick and Rochelle quickly looked at me, bewilderment their only expression, and I kept my stance.

Patrick gave a snicker, “Gay.”

I ignored him but Rochelle shoved him, roughly, and he quickly fell back into line.

We all watched Coach peer around a corner as distant noises of shuffling made us all cautious and curious, hoping it was Nick but scared he hadn’t made it far enough to clear out the area.

Coach’s head disappeared and reappeared with a disgruntled expression.

“Ain’t nothing to be seen but bodies,” He begun to tell us.

“Nicks?” I whimpered, fast.

He shook his head before quickly taking another look, making me extremely nervous, before giving a reassuring shake of his bald head. I clasped my hands together, thankfully.

“Let’s go then,” Patrick said, snidely, pressing past Rochelle and I.

I held my arm out quickly, pretending to be brave but really I had been frightened he were going to break it right off.

“I go first, he’s not yours to rescue,” I mumbled, weakly.

Patrick gave a shrug of his shoulders and gestured for me to move ahead of him and I gratefully nodded.

To everyone’s shock there was a large burst of fireworks and a loud screech. Colours had begun to burst in the sky and golden sparks shot upwards, ferociously, as a familiar voice hollered through waves of background music.

“Hey, that’s the midnight riders!” Coach yelled.

I paused and never collapsed under my own fright.

“NICK! THAT’S NICK!” I cried, pushing past and kicking off on the heel of my clunky boots.

“Ellis! Wait up!” The others shouted but I pressed through the stall.

I swung the safe house door open and saw the misplaced health kits and a trail of crimson, dragged through the doorway. I kneeled down and stared at it, depression filling my lungs and leaving a bitter taste of loneliness. There was a slight, comforting pat on my back and Rochelle’s high voice whispered, “He’s doing it for us,” which made me feel worse.

I got up and begun to restock items, quicker than any of the others, slotting items into the waist of my overalls.

“Slow down, do you really want to do this?” Coach murmured in my direction as he began to picking up ammunition.

“Of course I do!” I shouted, full of anger.

Patrick picked up a rifle, nodding delightfully, excited about his new power, “Your boyfriend is doing this for us, we can’t let him not have his moment,” He continued admiring the black, large sniper.

I immediately grabbed hold of it and jerked it out of his hands.

“That’s Nick’s favourite weapon, you can’t use it!”

Rochelle grabbed hold of my shoulders quick.

“You need to calm down, Ellis, we will get him and we will all survive, I promise,” She whispered.

Ro, the only one to console me in this situation, smiled genuinely at me. I frowned.

“Do you really promise?” I muttered and she nodded in return.

“As soon as these set of fireworks dim before another, we will go out then, let’s prepare ourselves first.”

We all settled for a bit. I held onto the door, trigger happy.

I don’t know if I was losing it but I could have sworn I heard Nick’s cry for help, very softly and distant and that’s when it happened, that’s when I ran. I ran and Rochelle was quick behind me, reaching out for me, as the shrieking of fireworks kept going, I stomped into the stadium, the other three hot on my heels, yelling angrily at me. And over the hollers of desperation to protect me and screeching of fireworks, nobody heard Rochelle yelling for help. Her body being slammed continuously into the cement by a large creature, cracking all her fragile bones in her body, blood leaking out every cut and bruises flowering across her.

Nobody heard.

Until it was too late.

All zombies were hoarding in the far corner of the bleachers and I quickly turned around, to see the green large dysfunctional body had disappeared behind the fence, and left a sad, pink mess on the floor.

“YOU FUCK!” Patrick yelled, his dark face turned crimson and he immediately grasped his large hands around my neck, as Coach tried to pry him off me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry i had to kill off more than one person


	19. NICK.

Once Coach had released Patrick’s death grip on my neck, imprinting purple and red marks deep, we had attracted a horde. Patrick had dropped his gun earlier when he went to attack me so Coach put all his willpower into keeping the crowd of infected from reaching us, he couldn’t pry Patrick off me the second time. Shots fired close to us and Patrick shoved me to the ground, kicked away an infected and shanked it, fiercely. My first assumption was that he had recused me from it but once all zombies had focused on Coach, he left him to fend them off and drew his attention to me as I tried to clamber to my feet. He shoved me again and I fell back fast, hitting my head on the concrete and rolling my hat off my head. He pinned me down, placing a foot on chest and reached down to swing at me.

“Patrick! Get off him!” Coach yelled as he was tugged at by common infected, clawing deep into his dark skin.

All I could think about was Nick as I was being repeatedly pummeled in the face. Patrick’s fist was hard and each hit was endured by rage, I tried to yell for him to stop, I tried to apologize but he swung at my jaw. I felt a rush of guilt when I almost asked Coach to shoot him but I withheld myself, Coach would save me after he had finished the wave of commons.  Blood flooded the back of my throat as I tried to sound something out; it came out terribly like a gurgling dying noise.

“NICK!” I screamed, swallowing the blood.

Hot tears were rushing down my face with a mix of blood, dribbling over flowering green and blue bruises. Patrick stopped as I choked up and I caught a glimpse of his enraged but guilty face through blurry tears before he quickly kicked at my ribs and I yelped, curling up immediately onto my side. I lay there for a while before the entire stadium went black, all power had been shut off and the fireworks paused midway, releasing a final explosion into the silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its only short bcos it didnt fit at the end of the last chapter nor the top of the new one


	20. Get off him.

“Sweetie, are you awake?” A dark figure bent down as I rubbed my eyes, carefully. I sniffled and adjusted to the daylight pouring in through boarded off windows.

“Hurry up and get him off me,” Nick’s familiar grumpy voice hissed.

My chest was burning and my sides were bruised to the extreme. I had awoken in a ticket booth, lying onto of Nick. The concrete floor was cold as if it hadn’t had any contact to it for a long time.

“Oh, young-un, you’re awake!”

“We were so worried about you,” Rochelle’s honey-like voice whispered, cupping my face in her hands, “That big hunter incident had really scared us.”

“I wasn’t worried or scared, thanks,” Nick insisted, shoving me further away from him.

Rochelle shook her head, softly, and grinned before mouthing, “He did care.”

I was still bewildered, Rochelle had died, Nick had run away and where was Patrick? I tried to say something but nothing came out.

 “P-Patrick,” I muttered and everyone turned their heads towards me, raising eyebrows.

“Oh god, he’s fucking delirious.”

Rochelle quickly shoved Nick and he shrugged it off with saying, “He is! Who the fuck is Patrick?!”

“It’s okay, sweetie,” She murmured to me.

I quickly got onto my feet, “Nuh, this’s happened befur.”

I pointed to Nick, “You run away,” Which he immediately responded with a fierce gesture of hands.

I looked at Coach, “Patrick ain’t savin’ yuh,” But Coach didn’t believe it.

Rochelle patiently waited for her update and I looked sadly over to her, “You, uh, Ro, you ain’t round long.”

“BULLSHIT! It was a dream!” Nick yelled as his gelled back hair begun loosing grip.

I paused and looked around before immediately remembering.

“There’ll be a Jockey, wait n listen!”

Nick rolled his eyes before a few moments later; there was a menacing, echoing cackle. Rochelle widened her eyes before shaking her head. Nick folded his arms.

“You already heard it, plus there’s always a Jockey around.”

I shook my head fiercely, shaking my golden hair about, “Nu uh, I have already seen this!”

Everyone begun to get bored and Coach had started to heave the dumpster to the side, scraping loudly along the concrete. Rochelle grabbed hold of my hand and batted her eyelashes.

“El, are you ok?” She asked, quietly.

I withdrew my hand and bounced back, almost screaming, “Believe me!”

“Okay,” Nick said, quick and fierce, and took hold of my shoulder, fast, “How come I run away?”

I immediately flush red and fluster with my words, nervously becoming weak under Nick’s hand.  I shrugged under his grasp and he rolls his dark, angry eyes.  Coach cleared his throat, making it obvious to draw attention to him.

“We’ll go this way, ok?” He stated as he nodded in another direction.

“That goes fucking nowhere!” Nick shouted, reddening in his sharp cheeks.

Coach leaned over to Nick, gripped his shoulder firmly and muttered, “We’ll make it go somewhere,” Before pushing him backwards and straightening up.

Nick growled, brushing himself off.

“But-” I tried to say before getting interrupted by Coach telling me he wants none of what I have to say.

Rochelle frowned, sympathetically at me, before stretching her thin arm towards me. She had her palm face up and I placed my hand in it. She squeezed it hard and I copied her actions.

 _I don’t want to lose you again, Ro, dream or no dream_ , I said aloud in my head.

“Stop it,” Nick immediately snapped, staring me down.

As I begin to withdraw my hand from Rochelle’s, she grasps tighter and Nick sighs.

“Stop that,” He states again, pointing at my face.

I touched my face with my free hand, gently as to be careful of my bruises and scars. I run my fingertips underneath my eyes and I feel tears dribbling over my fingers, I had no idea. I began to wipe furiously with the back of my hand, flustered.

Eventually we all passed the dumpster and came to the new path. Coach stood at the front, inspecting the blockage as Ro and I staggered behind him, I still hadn’t let go of Ro’s hand as I didn’t want to lose her at all. Nick slumped at the back, dragging his feet purposely.

“Right, up we go,” Coach muttered, waving us over.

He had crouched down, ready to boost us up. Rochelle frowned again at him, she frowned so often and there wasn’t anything I could do about it.

“Your knee,” She mumbled, sadness overtaking her worried tone.

Coach screwed up his face with a goofy smile, “Naw girl its fine.”

Nick joined finally and pushed me forward slightly, “You first, hick.”

“Awright,” I replied, braving myself and stepping closer to Coach.

I put my foot on his hand and grabbed the top of the chain fencing. The top of the wire cut into my hands but I ignored it and lifted over. As I looked down the fall seemed to be further than expected but it was too late to prepare myself as I had already tipped and gone shooting downwards. I landed hard on my back and lay for a while, groaning.

“Ah shit, tha hurt,” I exclaimed.

“Are you alright?” Coach asked, peering through the chains.

I made a noise to assure them I just need a moment to gather myself. As I slowly got up, clutching my back, I looked up at the others. They were holding onto the fence, even Nick. They began to shout at me and I screwed up my bleeding nose unable to make out what they were saying. Rochelle had stopped shouting and had a blank look on her face, she grew pale but nobody seemed to notice. Eventually they all became silent before Coach yelled “Watch out!”

I began to run towards the fence before being clung on to. Sharp, small claws dug into my shoulders which released ruby glistening blood that dribbled all down my front and back. I yelped and spun around, trying to shake it off. It kept making a horrible, high pitched snigger into my ear and I lost control. The small creature was steering me like a car and I did my best to resist. I caught glimpses of the others trying to scramble over the fence and shooting from a distance, barely passing through the chains.

“Get this thing offa me!”  I screamed.

It kept snickering and eventually the weight numbered my shoulders and threw me down on the ground. I had crushed it slightly upon falling down and the jockey became angrier. Instead of targeting the others it began to swipe its tiny paws at me, sending wounds to gash open and pour blood all round me. I had my arms up in defense.

“Help, someone please help!” I cried.

Hands began to tug at me all over and a horde had collected around me. I couldn’t hear the others for the groaning of the audience of my dying moments but one cry from Coach really drew my attention before everything faded into darkness.

“Patrick! Get off him!”


	21. There is never an ending to stories like these.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> its not the end

 

The weight on my chest became heavy as a shot sounded, sharp and fast. Quickly the weight rolled off me and I opened my eyes, barely, to a fuzzy perspective before a large shadow fell into view. It began to wipe me down of gunky substances and flick it off in disgust as footsteps approached me. I rubbed my eyes hard before seeing Coach, with his dark eyebrows furrowed together, his pale face began to paint brown once again. He pulled me up quickly, pulling me close harshly.

“Boy, you ever pull a stunt like that again, I’ll kill you myself.” He growled before eventually crushing me into a hug and whispering, “Thank god you’re ok.”

I managed to release myself eventually and a white suit, decorated dirty brown and red, raced past my line of vision. I turned to see Nick.

“Oh man, am I glad to see yew!” I howled, stepping closer to Nick before a sharp, fierce look which I had never seen before cut me off.

He pulled out his pistol before cocking it fast, stepping over Patrick’s body and releasing a bullet which caused a spray of blood. I yelped and cowered immediately, sensing danger from Nick. He began to shot furiously into the laying carcass and Coach put his hand on Nick. An immediate flinch from Nick had been a spiral of emotions inside me.

“Nicky boy, save it for something its worth.”

Nick kept firing, relentlessly before he let out a sob. Immediately he covered it up in more bullet shells.

“Nick,” Coach scowled. He snatched Nick’s pistol as he begun to reload.

My hands were shaking as I held my own baseball bat in two hands, pointed downwards. I looked across to the pile of death at the entrance of the stadium and scurried over holding Rochelle’s limp and distraught body. With a cry, I fell down and embraced her even in death. An approaching growl had me scrambling to my feet before I even let go of Rochelle and Nick hurried towards me, except he wasn’t Nick, it was as if Nick had died inside and come out darker than possible. I cowered, afraid he would strike me or worse, strike Ro’s dead body. He pushed me hard before kneeling down beside Rochelle.

“Come on, dammit,” He muttered to himself.

The air in the stadium became heavy and even in the distant I could see Coach’s legs shaking in fear of there being no hope. I had stumbled back to beside a white fence and held on to it, steadying myself. I shut my eyes and began to shake my head. Nick has to be himself. Nick wasn’t him but that is Nick. It were as if someone had begun to puppet him. I opened my eyes to the sound of a sharp groan.

“Quit shocking me!” A voice said.

A sense of purpose fell through me and I began to weep rushing forward to where Rochelle, once lifeless and nothing more than a feast for dead, became full of life once again. She shook her head as I barged past Nick and clung on to her. I refused to let her go, sobbing into her pink and red shirt. She placed a hand on my head and one on my back, delicately petting me.

“Ah’m so sorry, Ro,” I cried. “I never meant to lose you.”

She pulled me in closer, shushing and cooing as if I were a baby but I had no right to refuse that I wasn’t acting like one. “It’s okay, it happens but I’m here now.”

I cried even harder and made a vow in my mind to take a defibrillator at every chance I get. I finally let go and came face to face with Nick, who even didn’t look like himself. His eyes had fallen even darker and his mouth stuck in a frown.

“You’re lucky,” Nick said, emotionless.

I wiped at my eyes, quickly and sniffed. “Yeah.”

He began to march away, past Coach holding Rochelle and towards Patrick once again. He leant over and place his heel right into his bloody and holey forehead, pressing down and causing an explosion and rain of mush. I flinched at the sight.

“They just don’t give you a decent break,” He announced and following a rumble in the ground produced and a loud roar echoed. A sudden crash alarmed us as a brutal beast, almost 10 feet tall, fell out of the window near the stairwell we stood under. A horde beckoned after the thing as we all took off, preparing ourselves.

“Tank!” Coach yelled.

It gave a roar and I watched Nick run, a shocking pace, towards one of the scaffolding. Following his way a bit, I scavenged ammo and a Molotov before looking around for the others. I knew Nick was crazy but I couldn’t afford getting anyone killed again so I moved attention to me, racing past a group like bait. I hovered around the concrete floor off the stage and off the bleachers, pushing and shooting like it was what I was born to do. I hoped Nick had been watching. A rumbled approached me as I began to quickly replace my shotgun with the Molotov and a shadow cast in my direction parted the crowd of infected like the red sea. I launched the bottle and it crash into the ground only a few feet away from me, spreading along the concrete and climbing up the body of the beast and flowering red along it. I kept on my feet as I knew the fire wouldn’t hold it off long enough. Bullets barely missing me, piercing its thick skin but barely caused any slow in how fast it was catching up on me. Its stupid tongue hung out as it hobbled, an incredible pace for the lumbering creature.

 “Ellis!” Coach yelled over the screeching horde. “Health kit!”

He pointed in the direction of the stage and I instantly spotted the red, backpack trophies. I swept one up and rushed towards Coach and Rochelle covering one another’s backs as they fought in the east side of the bleachers. As I approached Coach he waved me over to Rochelle and quickly I got to work, patching her up, as she patiently shot off few intruders.

“I don’t need it!” She started. “Look at Nick!”

I shook my head. “No, Ro, not losing you again.”

She fell silent before saying, “Thank you.”

“Good as new,” I said before steering through the crowd once again, down to where the health kits sat.

I swept another up and looked at Nick and Coach. Nick sure needed it, obviously, but Coach had gone this whole time without a single complaint. “Maybe he’s not showing it,” I said to myself as I packed it on to my back. Either way I decided I would rush to Nick. This could be repairing for what happened. I raced towards him, smartly using his scope to keep Coach and Ro safe. I took my first step on the scaffolding ladder before he turned and spat at me.

“Go away,” He demanded but I kept climbing. “I don’t need your help.”

I kept ignoring his nasty words with good intentions in my mind and once I reached his level, I pulled the kit off my back and got to work. He replaced his sniper with his magnum, shooting at those that dared to cling to the side of the towering mess. He shoved at me.

“Stop it,” He scowled.

“Keep still,” I muttered back, sticking my tongue out in concentration before he shoved again, only lightly. I tried again until he eventually gave in.

“Ah ain’t a doctor,” I told him before a yell from afar cut me off.

“Copter!” Rochelle shrieked, excited.

Blades cutting through the air completely cut over my words and I soon could not be heard at all. Nick staring at the helicopter in awe quickly turned to me as it landed by Rochelle and Coach. They hurried on and the ground began to rumble once again as two tanks leapt out from nowhere. Tumbling towards where we stood, sounds of other fears broke out and Nick soared from the top of the scaffolding. I watched him fall, land harshly before he broke out in a hobbled run, pushing himself. I jumped down the first level and on to the second before there was a familiar growling behind me. I almost froze in horror as I came face to face with the hooded creature once again. I gathered myself and it crawled towards me, taunting with its echoing screeches before it leapt. In fright I pushed and it stumbled back, distraught. I took this moment to run before being caught up by a Tank. It launched me, far, but closer to the helicopter. As the desperate yells came from in the arms of safety I got to my feet knowing I needed to prove myself. Nick pulling out his sniper and stepping one foot out of the copter, onto the railings, leaned into his scope and aimed. I had been frightened he were knocking off the loose end from the team, me, but instead the hunter gave a pained shriek in the distance. I kicked off my boot and Coach and Rochelle had managed to clear an easy path for me. Nick stepped back into the helicopter as I leapt inside, breathless and heart pounding. Rochelle quickly caught me, squeezing me tight and touching me up and down, checking I was alright.

“Good work out there,” Coach added. “That hunter sure realized who was boss.”

He was slightly breathless too but I shone proud none-the-less. I looked towards Nick, who sat on his seat staring out the window of the now shut door. His eyes held home to no emotion but his head turned as I looked over at him. I tried to seek refuge in some sort of emotion in him but none could be found. I frowned and gave a deep sigh before looking out the window myself. Rochelle’s hand slipped over mine and gave a gentle squeeze but I still could find no home in that. The world below us was in shambles and even here I felt no safety.


End file.
